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The Muscles In My Legs
I could feel the muscles in my legs working, burning, tightening, releasing, pushing, pulling, and spinning round and round--and it felt good.
Date: 8/30/2005 1:50:45 AM ( 19 y ) ... viewed 1608 times August 29, 2005 @ 11:11 PM
Recently my husband and I moved to a place where the sun rarely stops shining. Where having a boat and a kayak and a bike and tons of camping gear are simply necessities of everyday life. So far we have the camping gear and the bikes.
The bike trails here are wonderful and endless. My husband has been riding almost everyday since we moved. Two Months ago he bought me a bike and bought the baby a bike seat. The first time I went for a ride was three weeks ago. What takes my husband 1 hour or less took me two hours or more. It was great to be outside. The trails were beautiful, the lake even more so, but I hated riding that bike. I was out of breath at every speed, my arms hurt, and the muscles in my legs burned--not in the good way. Still I used my mind and pushed myself to keep going, but by the end of the ride around the lake I felt so sad. Riding a bike was supposed to be fun. I couldn’t believe that it had not felt at all fun--not at any speed.
The next time I rode was a couple days after that. I was determined that if I just kept trying eventually it would feel fun. I took my daughter to the Zoo. I was so excited that I made it, I interrupted my husband at work to tell him. But my excitement was because I had made it in spite of it not being fun. It was hard and my body hurt the whole way. I didn’t ride my bike again until this morning.
So today when I finally instigated taking my mother and little sister on a bike ride since they had brought their bikes all the way from home to experience the bike trails here, I was not looking forward to it. Not to mention that we waited to long and the sun was sizzling the pavement even though it was only 10:30 AM--secretly I hoped they would wimp out due to the heat--they didn’t--and I am so glad.
Today it was fun. Eight days of drinking only maple syrup, lemon, and cayenne pepper, and at last I could feel the muscles in my legs working, burning, tightening, releasing, pushing, pulling, and spinning round and round--and it felt good. It was still hard, but I could dot it. I could breathe through it. My muscles had energy to work--so my mind got to have fun. I didn’t have to force myself to keep going--I wanted to keep going. Today the muscles in my legs felt like mine.
I am going to start riding my bike every morning for the second 10 day leg of my fast (only 2 days from now!), and I know my body is going to change dramatically during those second 10 days. I know that slowly the fat surrounding and suffocating my muscles will start to melt away, bringing them closer to the surface, closer to freedom, closer air, closer to me.
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