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Restart Success!
I am feeling a sense of Restart...Renewal...
I had an Initiation, and Created some Effective New Materials
for KEEP the BEET.
Date: 10/13/2008 4:31:49 AM ( 16 y ) ... viewed 1150 times
October 12, 08
Soul Filled Living involves having Restarts.
There are aspects of the Jewish New Year
that I have adapted into my personal Enchanted Garden Calendar.
One of these is the cycle of the New Year.
I am definitely coming home from outings in Los Angeles
from the Days of Awe--The Jewish New Year Cycle--with
a sense of Renewal.
There are many things I would find difficult in any communal religious experience.
It always brings up feelings for me of being an outsider.
Associations with Jewish experiences trigger childhood memories
still in my cells.
I have to overcome the ostracism card.
This goes back to the time of childhood when our Home was
the Center of our Community. My mother was the quite the baker
and cook. She kept the hearth going.
There was a steady stream of guests to our Holiday meals.
We lived right next to the Synagogue.
My Father was also Central to the Life of the Jewish Community.
He had functions at the Synagogue that we called the Shule.
The Shule was about 25 feet from my bedroom.
It was hard not to be permiated by this.
It also set up an Immune System Issue.
My boundaries were invaded.
There are places in my writing where I have writing about this
extensively. I have also written about my issues with Father extensively
on this Plant Your Dream Blog.
Every year, I have to come up with Strategies to once again feel included.
The Community I join for the High Holidays is called B'nai Horin.
B'nai Horin means Children of Freedom. The name comes from
a sentence, once we were slaves, now we are Children of Freedom.
I succeeded again this year. I got in.
I used all my skills, including photography.
I used the photography to build a Bridge from my inner sense
of isolation to my outer.
Can You Hear me? That is another of my Underlying Themes
that is part of the Material I have to work through to feel Accepted.
Can you Hear me? Can I be effective in communicating something?
KEEP the BEET Media Star was new to the B'nai Horin Community.
The Yom Kippur, Day of Atonement, ends with a lovely service called
Neilah. We sit in a circle in an Ampitheatre outdoors.
There is a natural Microphone if you stand in a certain place in the Cirlce.
Rabbi Stan traditionally Opens a Space in Neilah for me.
This year he was especially supportive.
He generally tells me to be brief. This time he told me to take the time
I needed, basically, but be succinct. He told me when he felt I had a minute left.
Lisa made a song about KEEP the BEET.
it involved the words from the poem I did,
RICH DEEP. REACH HIGH. KEEP THE BEET.
I will adapt some of that for PCOM's,
Pacific Symposium November 5-10, my next event.
I will check on that tomorrow
as well as take some time to integrate.
This year, I was very frustrated around the first part of the High Holidays--
Rosh Hashanah.
I have been involved in a cleanup around here for what feels like a few months.
We are actively clearing the basement.
I have decades of things in there.
I left myself two days for prep for the Trip up to Rosh Hashanah.
I could not get my Focus within two days.
I left with my pants down, or by the seat of my pants.
There were too many factors against me to feel Effective,
including my Bowel Inflammation.
It does not help if I have to keep my attention focused
on the location of the nearest bathroom.
Bright Red Blood--Beet Red--and torn tissue from Hemorriods
was also a factor this year.
More to write...back to bed.
I am definitely feeling a sense of Restart.
When all was said and done, I had a very healing Communal Experience
and effectively communicated. I was heard.
I made some folks happy.
I had some enriching experiences with children and Teens.
I was able to be generous with a community.
I earned some funds, enough to pay the bills going
and get a sense that my work is appreciated.
I am set up to Evaluate more....my Net Worth
that for me is really influenced by my sense of Self Worth.
MORE TO SAY about NEW MATERIALS...
Progress Report on main Seed Dreams.
Order Lettuce Seeds....visit Bill Tall...
Redo Notebooks at Staples....
and something for SEEDING OUR DREAMS...
Stabilize BOWEL now.
Appointment at PCOM.
Appontment with Nuva Yeetah.
I was also working against Mercury Retrograde....
i have energy to clear my room....
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