I tried, failed, still want to die.

5 YEARS ago is the most recent post here...Has Cure Zone gone quiet?

I attempted suicide two weeks ago. I was sure I had done it - car exhaust into the car, sealed up, CO poisoning was my method.

The cigarette lighter would not light, due to low O2 and high CO [monoxide]. I was panting, could not get a breath, passed out, car running... two hours... should have died eh?

I woke up at about 2.5 hrs, the car was not running. I did not shut it off, the key was in RUN position. It started up right away.

I had balance problems for two days - a sign of CO poisoning.

I was completely okay with dying, and when I woke up I just said "oh, noooooo". I really want to be dead and it isn't because I am angry at anyone or whatever.

When I think of it, ya I just want to be dead. I have lived with chronic -pain, and then Trigeminal Neuralgia ["the suicide pain"].

See? It is normal to say "enough" when pain and disability have been my life for the past 35 years. I am only 60 yrs old, I could live another 20 or 30 years but I don't want to.

I think I am being reasonable. Two questions: Am I being reasonable, and Why did the car shut off Tweet