Date:   10/27/2014 10:28:44 AM ( 10 y ago)
Hits:   8,518
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=2215259

I will just add, that I've recently read some research done with gay people who've had NDE's which suggests that gay men were formerly female before being incarnated on earth, and gay women formerly male. That their previous gender exerts a strong influence in this incarnation and this is why they end up gay. I don't know if this is true but it rings possibly true with me. As a thought experiment, I've strongly imagined what it would have been like if every person I'd encountered in this life, including parents, school teachers, priests (I was raised catholic), had told me that as I would grow up I would develop sexual attractions for either males or females, but that either was perfectly normal and that God loved both heterosexuals and homosexuals equally. I imagined if everyone believed this and there was no shame or fear whatsoever around being gay. My strong conclusion was that I would developed naturally and happily as a gay man, without confusion. That so much pain would have been avoided and that I would have exercised my sexuality in an appropriate and responsible way. That so much energy I've spent in hiding, fearing, pretending I was different, wishing things were different, in trying to change, in hating myself, in depression, in periods of promiscuous acting out.. none of it would have happened and that energy would have been spent on other things like my love of music or my spiritual development. I also realised that so much of the shame I've had was to do with knowing that I had female qualities and attributes that as I man I wasn't meant to have, and that I had to hide from my peers because it was shameful to have these inside, which makes me wonder about men's subconscious attitudes to the feminine in general in our culture. But I suggest another thought experiment for anyone interested in maybe developing more understanding for what it's like to be a homosexual. I suggest strongly imagining what it might be like to have grown up surrounded by women as your peers, if you're a man, and that in your culture there was a strong subconscious prejudice that women and feminine attributes were in some way superior. Now you are sexually attracted to women, but amongst women, your peers .. It is seen as extremely shameful to have these attractions, shameful to exhibit any masculine qualities or attributes and anytime your mask slips and you show that truth about yourself for a moment you are ridiculed. On top of that you are also told that people like you are sinful and God possibly hates you. How successful do you think you would be exercising your natural sexual drives in a responsible, moral and appropriate fashion? Anyway, I don't mean to push this or to be self pitying, I am sure those of us who are gay were made this way for a reason, maybe to work out karma or to develop more compassion or love, but I thought it might be helpful just to think about it in this way for some people. As I kind of suggested above, part of my struggle is to open my heart and accept with love and compassion my own sexuality. It's something maybe gay people and straight people have in common.
 

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