Teilah
I think the solution may be not to make her the centre of your Universe, it is uncomfortable living up to those expectations and the more you hold on out of fear of losing this woman the more she will retreat. These things can never be lived up to and can be extremely uncomfortable and unsettling for your ex girlfriend. I knew a lady that was a painter and was very cultured and her husband was very clingy and she just withdrew even more. She could not cope with his flattery and worship. You need to command those energies in your own life that make your existence fulfilling instead of accidentally trying to mistakenly elicit it through others. You need to find your own "centre" through which you can derive life and strength in yourself and personal fulfilment. There are illimitable resources in your own self for your realisation and you can do it with or without a partner! You need to grasp the nettle and celebrate your life and open yourself to possibilities for fulfilment and satisfaction. Many people do not know how to do this as they witness this in others and think it is an impossibility for themselves. I knew a woman who was a shaman and her life was brimming with immeasurable meaningfulness and joy and people were drawn to her liveliness like a magnet but she also endured people who lived through her and could not strike out a path of their own. That is what you need to do, to learn to do those things for yourself, to let go of this woman if necessary and find the means to enhance your life even more. You haven't lost anything as the world is available to you, not just through the agency of this lady. You may not know how to do this, perhaps it begins with curiosity and the drive to pursue something of intense interest and following it through. I hope my words encourage you. I do not wish to offend. Don't worship her, she is human like you, be encouraged that you have the same potentialies and worthiness and you have survived without her in the past before you met her and you can equally cope now! It is not the end of the Universe, your life has a current that will take you to many places if you allow it. There is plenty more and you can cultivate all areas of your life and not just from romantic attachments. View your life from the perspective of a whole and have a balance in all areas of your life. Things come and go there are many losses and changes so it how is best to shore up your life in other dimensions of endeavour as well no matter attractive other opportunites are in the present time. Good luck - just remember you have many things in you favor not just this relationship, it may cause you pain and anguish but you will eventually get over the sadness and embrace life even more fully.