Hello every one I need your up most honesty. My wife recently found out that I had cheated on her. We have done it both to eachother back and forth but it was all due to my initial mistake. I have been away from home for about 4 months now and really got my stuff together regarding the physical aspect. My thing is this my wife left me in march and she said we were getting divorced in my anger I sought out comfort point blank no excuses. I stopped talking to the woman on the last week of April when my wife said she wanted to work things out. I went home in June to visit my wife for ten days we were fine she said we would make it work. I caught her a few days later when I left hiding what she was doing with a "friend" I immediately called up the other woman to confide in her which led to a series of other emotion I started referring to this woman like she was my wife even though I knew it was wrong I still did because I still wanted my wife. I find out this woman is pregnant for about 2 months and I tell her my suspicions of it not being mine but I still continue with her. In august my wife reveals to me all her wrong doing and how she wants to truly make it work and so do I so I happily agree but I didn't end it with the other woman. Now at this point I haven't seen the other woman in 2 months now either. The woman is four months pregnant and I'm still talking to her and talking to my wife as if they are one because I feel bad about telling this woman how I really feel about not wanting to be with her. I muster the courage to tell the other woman and she ends up losing the baby that same day. I felt trapped and no where to go the woman thought I would be there for her I didn't want to be the cause of her doing something irrational because of my words so I continued to comfort her until about the last week of September. I finally got rid of my issue I thought well the woman messaged my wife tell her everything and how I lies to the both of them about several things. Now my wife has filed for divorced and I have finally grown out of my cheating ways I have no urges to seek attention from other women I don't put myself in those positions and I want to show her I have changed. But she doesn't believe me and by all rights she shouldn't. I want to know what do I do from here? I tell her everyday that it's what ever she wants. Some days she'll talk to me but it'll turn into the ill never change conversation. I found out that she has been talking to several other people and I don't blame her I just don't know what to do we have been together for 4 years and we have a 3 year old