are you strong enough to tell him:

"This stops NOW. I do not want this to happen anymore and we must stop doing it because I want it to stop."

You ARE strong enough!

You CAN do this! And telling him to stop will help to make YOU a stronger person!

You can do it!

I care.

I'm not clear on something---you say that he stopped touching when you were 12 but you also say "he hasn't raped me yet". So---what exactly is happening? Is he still touching you inappropriately? Or are you worried that he will start doing that again? How much older is he than you?

Whatever the exact situation is, you do need to tell someone. Tell either or both your parents NOW. If you fear doing that, talk to your school guidance counselor. If you don't want to do one of those options, then call:
1-800-656-HOPE. It's the hotline for RAINN. The person on the other end of the line can give you good advice. You can also look at their website: http://www.rainn.org
for more information.

You must find the courage to speak up about what is occuring. If your brother isn't stopped, he will end up abusing other females.

Please scroll down through the "Abuse" forum. You will see a thread started by a 14 year-old boy, JTM14. He, too, was being abused but found the courage to speak up. Read his words to give you strength and inspiration.

Good luck and please get going!

Golly, hon...your family relationships are already broken.

I don't know exactly what should be done, but I doubt that these breaks can be 'mended'.

Rather, I think that you will all have to form new ways of relating to each other...or not.

Sadly, you have lost opportunities to be the ideal and typical family, but you have other opportunities ahead. Sometimes things happen that are totally unexpected. And sometimes a person can see exactly what they want to do. Other times you just have to wait.

Above all, do things that make you proud of yourself and your ability to manage yourself calmly and maturely.

Burying sadness within is no way to live. It brings more problems as you grow older, compounds them. On the other hand, creating fusses never helps.

It's best if you have another member of the family replace unhappiness with a solid and uplifting relationship. You now need to be proud of yourself.

Wait and watch for such a strong friend. It isn't necessarily going to be easy, but you will be wonderfully pleased when it comes.

This is your time of learning better. At least you now can begin to see what you prefer.

You've come a long way!


My best,

Fledgling