My "black heart" My "black heart" My "black heart"

Can I cleanse it?

Date:   5/2/2007 4:03:15 PM   ( 17 y ) ... viewed 1854 times

When I was 13 I was dating this boy whose Mom was a psychic. She told me that she could see that I had a "black heart with good intentions". I'm not sure what that means to this day, but I still think about it from time to time. I want to be a good person but I have so much anger. I'll ge mad at something and I'll say to myself "let it go, just let it go" or I'll even try to meditate or pray. Nothing seems to work for me. I'm hostile and I hate it about me. If you knew me, you'd think I was "the sweetest girl" but if you REALLY knew me, I don't know what you'd think.





I am really trying though. That's one reason behind this fast, I want to try to meditate more heavily and I heard that you meditate better when you fast. The main thing I want to cleanse myself of is all this negativity. I want to cleanse my "black heart". I would like to be the kind of person who can just let things go. I hate that I give people or situations the power to get myself so upset. It is so much wasted energy and when I think of that, I get even angrier. What a mess. So that's what I'm working on. My goal with this fast is to be more forgiving, understanding and tolerent. Whew! Taking on all this with no smoke, no wine and an empty tummy. Are you sure I can't smoke? Just kidding.

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