Despite long pregnancies, labor was relatively short… I recall intense lower back pain for a fairly brief period.

Still in my womb, you and I went grocery shopping on the afternoon of your birth. We were accompanied by your two-year-old sibling and your Nana – and joined by your father for a restaurant meal that evening. That is when labor began... I remember being given gas to slow down your arrival for prep work. Nonetheless, your dad was still answering questions in the admitting office when he received a call from the delivery room announcing your arrival.

The labor pain, all-day “morning sickness” and the discomfort of a long pregnancy were instantly forgotten the minute I saw you and was able to hold you in my arms. You actually seemed to recognize me, and I will always remember how bright-eyed and beautiful you were…

The prose above is part of my birth story – as written by my Mother. Teaching “Nurturing the Mother” (NTM), a Prenatal Massage Certification Workshop for Claire Miller Seminars, Inc., I value the importance of the work that begins by telling our own birth stories.

***

The Baltimore NTM workshop last year was deeply profound. I want to share one student’s story (we’ll call her Norah, although not her real name) and how telling her birth story changed her view of herself and her family. Norah was a premature baby, and her mother had not held her until five weeks after her birth. At the workshop, Norah expressed that she did not feel comfortable hugging her mom the way her other siblings did. She then realized this was due to the lack of bonding in her very early life. It was not an issue of love, but an issue of bonding.

Norah’s realization facilitated a dialog with her mom, and helped to heal both of them. Norah later shared that she often felt she was not connected to what was going on around her. She felt she was an observer, outside the group. She could feel things, but was not connected to whatever group she was in. Someone commented that Norah seemed as if she were still in the incubator – insights that were right on target. The workshop was a powerful force for healing Norah’s trauma.

Here are some interesting psychological theories of birth issues:

· Caesarian babies may feel they always need to be helped out of situations or expect to be rescued. They may have difficulty overcoming obstacles or take the easy way out.

· Pitocin birth babies may feel “overwhelmed” or feel powerless.

· Breach birth babies often feel responsible for others’ pain and are extreme people-pleasers. They may be conflicted about moving forward or making changes and spend a lot of unnecessary energy “struggling.”

The birth process gives us a map by which to live. We are healing the future and the past with all of us. In my Mom’s account of my birth she wrote, “You actually seemed to recognize me.” I am sure Mom did not know how right she was!

Fetology is a branch of science focusing on the effects of the environment on the developing fetus. In my HypnoBirthing® Childbirth education classes, we watch a video, Knowing the Unborn. It delves into emotional bonding with the unborn to make better babies. The unborn child is a feeling, remembering, aware being. I am sure I did recognize my mother… her smell… her voice. I knew her before I was born.

Everything you think, feel and do while pregnant has a profound impact on your child both before and after birth. Parents cannot wait until their baby is born to realize the influence of their baby’s environment upon its development. Birth is NOT the beginning. Birth is the continuum of life.

In the book Prenatal Parenting, Dr. Frederick Wirth points out that:

· By the time the fetus has completed the 12th week of gestation, the total number of neurons he will have for the rest of his life have already formed.

· By 28 weeks, he has already developed all of his senses as well as those brain parts dedicated to emotional responses and memory.

· By 28 weeks, the unborn infant is developing concepts about himself and the world in which his mother lives.

Every year an increasing number of babies are born prematurely or with behavioral disorders. Learning how to think positively and communicate with your partner and/or medical staff can help prevent a pre-term baby and aid in the positive development of your unborn child’s personality. A baby’s in-utero experience builds the brain architecture that will determine behavior throughout life. Dr. Wirth has exercises to help you control stress, fear, guilt and anger – changing unwanted behaviors during pregnancy.

Boris Brott of the Hamilton, Ontario Symphony discovered he could play a certain piece of music sight unseen. While conducting a score for the first time he knew what was coming next before turning the page. He later found out that his mother, a violinist, had practiced that particular piece of music repeatedly during her pregnancy.

Most of society is unaware of the scientific advancements confirming the connecting of the mother with her baby during pregnancy. In HypnoBirthing classes, moms are given a button that says “PLEASE! Only happy birth stories…My baby is listening.”

How magnificent the opportunity we have, as individuals, to share this knowledge and information in a non-judgmental manner with love – nurturing and encouraging peaceful solutions for future generations.

Tag Woods is founder and president of Body Philosophy ~ Massage and Bodywork for Women. Tag graduated from Body Therapy Institute. She is a Licensed Massage and Bodywork Therapist in the State of North Carolina, certified by the National Certification Board of Therapeutic Massage and Bodywork, Certified Prenatal Massage Therapist, Certified HypnoBirthing® Practitioner, Certified Doula, Certified Newborn and Infant Massage Instructor. You may contact Tag at 336-992-6135 or tag.woods@juno.com .

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