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day 6
a few cravings today bring good realizations
Date: 1/26/2008 3:41:07 PM ( 16 y ) ... viewed 2680 times hey everyone. today is day 6 of my fast. i think that im going to cut my fast short to 20 days instead of 28, because i have some friends coming to visit and i want to be able to show them around, and theyre going to want to go to dinner. i think 20 days should be sufficient for my health purposes, and i'm giving myself enough time then to break the fast with juice for a few days and then raw food. that way, i will be able to go to dinner with them and be fully there with them while still eating healthily - i need to give myself enough time before i jump right back into eating whole food again, even if just fruit and vegetables, so i think 20 days will be perfect.
today has been pretty good. energy wise i felt nice, but i was having some cravings today. i wasnt hungry but i had a bit of a strange feeling in my stomach, and i started thinking about eating fruit, like a big juicy apple, and it just seemed sooo delicious and appetizing (i take it as a good thing that if i have to have cravings, at least its for fruit!) i just reminded myself to stick it out, because even if i did decide to break my fast today, i could just go right into eating solid foods - id need about 2 days of just juice, and thats not what i am having cravings for.. so i dealt with it. i'm going to make sure that no matter how long my fast goes, i will break it properly. when i did the mastercleanse, i didnt break it properly because of bad timing - i took an unexpected trip, and while i did have a day of just juice, i went right into eating regular food and it was very hard to handle. not to mention that i felt like i wasted two weeks of discipline as i went right into eating food that i had been cleansing my system of. it was just really tough to be around it and my friends were giving me a really hard time about it - so i started and it was tough to stop then, even if i felt pretty gross afterwards. anyway, it was a very good lesson and i know that the discipline is worth it in the end. somethings different about doing an all water fast for me though - maybe it was that the lemonade from the master cleanse was keeping my digestive system active and i was thinking more of eating the whole time (i had crazy cravings for most of the time) and when i came off of the cleanse, i was so kind of crazed by these cravings that i ended up eating food i wouldnt have eaten before my cleanse because they are just plain bad for you to have more than once as a small treat - on my water fast, food other than fruit and nuts and beans just doesnt really seem appetizing to me and i just dont have an appetite for them. i think i could sit down and try to eat them if i wanted, but i just dont think i'd have a drive to eat more than a few bites.
that is essentially one of the biggest breakthroughs for me doing this fast. i'm really not overweight - i'm 5'7.5'' and i went to school around 128-130 ish pounds, and i definitely overdid it and i put on about 15 pounds so that i was around 145, but while i felt pretty heavy because i've always been around 125, im not noticeably heavy at all. . just enough for me to feel pretty unhealthy, because i got that way from eating badly. anyway, prior to the fast i just had a really hard time with portion control. i'm not totally sure when it started but i just sat down and would have to finish what was in front of me, even if i didnt totally love it. i just kind of lost the ability to pay attention to my appetite. and then, if it was something that i really really loved, then i'd eat even more of it to the point of being almost uncomfortable. i think that the past year i've just been a little off after my master cleanse, and this is great for me, because for the first time i'm realizing not how much in excess i was eating ( i knew what i was doing) but that i can finally control it, because the urge is just not there anymore. its been amazing to just completely step back from everything and be able to start over completely fresh, with no temptation to eat junky foods because the urge is just not even there.
i'm feeling a bit tired right now and i have a little bit of a headache, so i'll take a nap and see how i feel. otherwise, things are going well, and while today was bit on the tougher side with the cravings and such, it had nothing to do with hunger and i can stick it out. no bms today but i feel good. talk to you soon!
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