Re: My story...a host of sudden debilitating symptoms

Based on your symptoms I believe there are three areas you are having problems with.  The adrenals, the thyroid and the liver.  The thyroid issues could be compounded by adrenal or liver problems.

What triggered this?  Most likely bacterial food poisoning from the lobster bisque. The toxins from the bacteria can cause damage to the kidneys, thereby affecting the adrenals, and the liver.

Breaking it down a little more for you the allergies and other sensitivities indicate adrenal dysfunction.  The low blood pressure and passing out also leads me to believe it is adrenal related as well as the puffiness in the hands.  Allergies/sensitivities stem from a lack of antihistamine and antileukotriene epinephrine (adrenaline) and immune modulating and anti-inflammatory corticosteroids being released from the adrenals.  Chronically low blood pressure and passing out can occur from a lack of epinephrine being released, which helps to maintain blood pressure by constricting blood vessels.  There are other possible reasons for this, but coupled with the other symptoms this leads me to believe that it is adrenal related in this case.   And the swelling in response to the salt sounds like a problem with lack of mineralcorticoids also from the adrenals.  Caffeine weakens the adrenals, which would exaggerate these symptoms.  But what really got my interest was when you said "I had half of a small DECAF latte and all hell broke loose.   I had difficulty breathing".  The reason this is so important is because this sounds like an allergic reaction.  Yet if caffeine is taken in times of emergency, such as during an asthma attack (an inflammatory allergic condition) the caffeine can actually help counter the attack.  It does this because it is a cyclic adenosine monophosphate dieesterase inhibitor (cAMPPDEI).  Normally during an allergic reaction the adrenals will release epinephrine, which in turn elevates levels of an enzymatic regulator called cyclic adenosine monophosphate (cAMP).  Among its other effects cAMP will counter histamine and leukotriene to stop the attack.  But cAMP is short lived as it is quickly broken by an enzyme called adenosine monophosphate dieesterase (cAMPPDE).  Caffeine can stop an allergic reaction, if used occasionally as to not crash the adrenals, by blocking this enzyme and thus prolonging the anti-allergenic effects of the cAMP.  This therefore tells me that you are not generating enough cAMP in the first place, which means the adrenals are likely not producing enough epinephrine, which is also evidenced by the blood pressure issues.

Your low body temperature indicates thyroid dysfunction.  This can also account for a lot of the brain fog.  Lab tests are notoriously inaccurate when it comes to hypothyroidism, and they often miss this condition.  Low body temperature and other symptoms are much better indicators.  The tricky part to hypothyroidism is trying to figure out what is causing it as there are numerous causes.  Adrenal dysfunction is one cause, and since it appears your adrenals are in really bad shape I would assume this is the cause first.  For this reason I would focus more on building up the adrenals more than the thyroid at this point.

I also suspect your liver for a few reasons.  Primarily because of this statement:  "All day, every day, I have a brain fog.  And I'm finding that I get lightheaded when I eat any sort of protein...fish, chicken, tofu, you name it."  Protein is made up of amino acids, which are based with ammonia.  As the amino acids are metabolized ammonia is a byproduct.  This ammonia is very toxic, and if it is not properly metabolized by the liver you can end up with high levels of ammonia causing brain fog.  If it gets severe enough this can lead to coma.  You also said that you get enough sleep these days.  That makes me wonder if you are sleeping more than normal, which can also be a symptom of high ammonia.  You also mentioned itching all over, which can also result from liver damage.  Other symptoms that you can look for include loss of appetite, fatigue, bruise easily or get nosebleeds, edema in the legs, white nail beds instead of pink, clubbing on the fingernails, darkening of the skin, jaundice (check the whites of the eyes or under the tongue), spider nevus that is frequently seen in the face area, or nausea.  Liver damage can also lead to kidney damage, which can affect the adrenals.  This also brings up the possibility of hepatitis, as hepatitis viruses can be passed from seafoods, especially crustaceans and shellfish.

Did they check your liver enzymes?

You are on the right track with supporting your adrenals.  There are several herbs I would focus on for this though.  One is chaparral, which not only supports the adrenals but also is a very strong antimicrobial and blood cleanser.  Schisandra berry will support the adrenals as well as the liver and kidneys.  Ashwagandha will support the adrenals and the thyroid.  Amla berry is also a good idea as it not only supports the adrenals, but it also supports the immune system by raising superoxide dismutase (SOD), and it protects the DNA from heavy metal damage.  The reason this last part is so important is because you mentioned drinking a lot of wine.  Wine frequently contains high levels of lead.

Silica also helps to remove lead from the body.  Food grade diatomaceous earth is the best source.

Because of your sensitivities I don't want you introducing a lot of new things suddenly.  Therefore, I recommend starting with the herbs mentioned, which will also help strengthen the liver so it can tolerate the herbs better that I will recommend later.

One other thing I recommend though is adding watercress to your diet.  Watercress is very nutritional, will support the adrenals and thyroid, and is a natural anti-histamine.  It is also high in sulfur, which will help with strenghtening the tissues and with detoxification.