"i want to make my self suffer.you know when ever i have an argument with my husband i want to harm myself, i mean cause pain .wierd .any body knows why i feel like that."

When life feels so overwhelming, sometimes people hurt themselves to cope with it.  It is almost like a release.  The problem is the pain comes back.  Please don't start that cycle because it is so hard to break.  Trust me I've been there with the guilt of hurting myself adding to the misery and hiding the marks along with my shame.

I worry about you because I have been where you are.  In fact I finally did try to end my life while my daughters (then 3 and 2) were sleeping in their beds.  Anyone who tries to judge my life then just cannot understand how incredibly worthless I felt.

What you need to learn is that you are strong and you are wonderful and many people (including your daughter) would be forever changed if you left their world.  This sounds so trite and is difficult to believe when you are in the place you are at.  I wish with all my might that I could change how you feel but I cannot.

Please email me if you need someone to talk to.  I sincerely want to help and will not judge anything you say.  It can't hurt to try.

Truly,
Peanut

Master Cleanse for the Mind and Soul
http://curezone.com/blogs/f.asp?f=811