Re: is it normal for husband to look at bikini models online (secretly)? by been there done that ..... Relationship Support Forum
Date: 8/30/2007 3:24:14 AM ( 17 y ago)
Hits: 13,761
URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=953130
Sure he got "enraged" (like an injured animal gets vicious), he was very defensive because he got caught. He changed his tune when pubicly confronted (what respect does he show for you in PRIVATE?), but having God handy, he decided to play the victim that deserves pity, and seized the opportunity to blame/justify his actions on "cosmic intervention" (doesn't sound like an "upstanding citizen" to me).
He trained you to feel that you "overreact" and be apologetic (you're doing very well) that you do (he wants you to be apologetic to him in private, but you might also be apologetic in daily life because you have been "conditioned", no skin off his back).
Narcissists love secrecy (for schemes) and will use certain words strategically in order to make you emotional (wants you to be subjective, NOT objective, causing chaotic and confused thinking making you feel UNSURE that you're "overreacting", diversion of guilt, transference). They HATE public exposure of their REAL intentions/behavior, but they like having an audience to cheer them on when they belittle or mock you.
TRUST YOUR JUDGEMENT.
But if you wise up and he understands that he can no longer get away with his sneaky little scheming secrecy (because he is now EXPOSED), there is a possibility that he will change (because he does have SOME recognition of God and possibly the "absolutes" of justice and truth, now he only needs genuine courage to face CONSCIENCE). You have to sit down with him and have a long talk and come to an agreement where he will welcome your scrutiny without question and without limitation relying on only YOUR decisions (without any influence or objections from him) of when and where you monitor his actions.
Evil is like an animal, it instinctually knows what it needs to survive. If it needs you to become emotional in order to change the subject and avoid exposure of what is just and who really is at fault, that is what will be done (subconsciously).
<< Return to the standard message view
fetched in 0.02 sec, referred by http://www.curezone.org/forums/fmp.asp?i=953130