Date:   4/28/2007 7:31:16 AM ( 17 y ago)
Hits:   31,183
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=857892

Fledgling, your post is right on target! The narcissists and NPD's that I've been exposed to never, ever played dumb - women and men, alike. One gal I knew and considered a dear friend, was so desperate to be "right" that she would take great pains to compose what she called, "...a scathing letter." This practice, to my knowledge, was never abandoned - from committee chairpersons to editors, she spent more time composing these things that anyone I've ever seen. Always, she would believe that her views, opinions, belief systems, etc., could never be argued with.

Children DO need to see other examples - you are so right about that point. I offered my children (by example) a different path of honesty, integrity, hope, faith, etc., and they still opted for the path of destruction. It becomes a choice when all options are on the table and those that lead to healing and a happy life are abandoned.

I thoroughly agree with your opinion on confrontation. In a perfect world, confrotnation would be welcomed - heck, there would be no need for confrontation, right? LOL! No, a narcissist (particularly, NPD) must always be right, even if doing so damages their image. My ex could never speak the truth, even if it was to his own best interest. An example of that was when we were in Family Court and my attorney asked him, "Mr. Jackass, you don't particularly like Francis Williams (a court-appointed counselor that had pegged the ex for what he was with a false name), do you?" He answered, "I like her just fine. I don't have any problem with her." She had written a very damaging report on how he had behaved towards her, me, and our children and it would have been to his credit if he had spoken truth and responded with, "I can't stand her. I think she's intrusive and I have nothing to say to her." But, he didn't. How can a person "...like her just fine..." when the counselor had pegged him in an official document as the abusive bastid that he is?

Crazy, huh?

I opt to walk away from anyone who creates a negative influence in my life - be they family, friends, or coworkers. If I have no choice but to be exposed to them (coworkers, in particular), I keep the interaction to a minimum and try as best as I can to avoid falling into the cesspool that they love to stir up.
 

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