Date:   12/8/2006 2:58:51 PM ( 18 y ago)
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URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=787883

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When You Have A
Critical Moment
by Michele J. Johnson

Have any of you noticed that sometimes when you try to create something certain obstacles will come up which question exactly what you're trying to create? I've wondered if this is some kind of test, you know, to see how bad I really want the creation.

For instance, I decided to create "good health". I've been doing everything right. So then something happens which throws off my emotional health, and in turn affects how I feel physically. In the middle of this, I begin to question my creation because I certainly did not feel like I was in any way "creating good health". I felt totally out of control as these emotions seemed to take over my body. I couldn't bring myself to exercise...I couldn't sleep well...which was affecting the very thing I was trying to create. I began to question the affirmations, my ability, and even my very existence! Anyone else experience this?

I've come up with a list of things to do in a critical moment such as what I was experiencing. These are things which can be used to alleviate the current emotional stress and return oneself to being a creator of their own good. You can do one or more of these things during a critical time...whichever feels right for you.

Pray... give the emotion and the circumstance over to your God and just breathe deeply and pray.
Cry... crying releases the tightness your body may be experiencing. Emotional stress to me is like a storm brewing inside... I can physically and mentally hear, see, and feel the thunder and lightening racking my inner world. Crying is the rain that comes during the storm... it's cleansing to the body and soul just as a summer rain shower cleanses the earth. I feel refreshed afterwards, just as the earth smells clean and refreshed after a shower. Do whatever you can to cry.... go in a room alone and allow it to come. Watch a sad movie - just find something to encourage the tears to come on out.
Laugh... laughter releases pent-up up stress and emotions as well. Laugh about how ridiculous it is that when you try to create one thing, you subconsciously create additional obstacles.... laugh at the thought of you testing yourself like this, and how silly it seems to be saying these affirmations when you certainly don't feel like they even apply. Watch a humorous movie or recall a humorous memory. But laugh... it will make you feel better and return you to the state you wish to be in afterwards.
Talk it out.... to your spouse, or trusted friend, or partner. If no one is there, talk to yourself. Ask yourself questions and answer them. This helps to get whatever is going on out in the open. And talking to yourself might cause laughter, which would also be helpful.
Do some form of physical exercise. Exercise loosens up your insides as the adrenaline begins flowing. With each move you make during exercise, you can see that you have not lost control.... you are still in control. This seems to help when you are feeling out of control. Because you control each sit up or leg lift or step you take, you slowly realize you are still the one in charge here.
Ask someone to hug you. There is something about the physical touch of someone else that helps you to realize a feeling of "support". Sometimes when doing these statements, one can begin to feel all alone. A hug from someone lets you know you are not alone and you are supported. If you're uncomfortable asking for a hug - then GIVE ONE.... you're almost sure to get one in return.
Breathe. Concentrate on your breath - in and out. Try to slow it down, try to speed it up. See the control you have and experience as you do this. Imagine your breath as a movie on the VCR.... you can fast-forward it or you can slow it down. Close you eyes and visualize clear breath moving through your body. Just breathe.
Surrender. Don't be attached to the outcome. Continue with your efforts, and know that they are the right things for you to do at the moment, but surrender any attachment you have as to the outcome. It's the attachment to outcome, to things being a certain way, that brings us pain. Peace comes with letting go, surrendering, and acceptance. It also makes us more open to learning from our experience, instead of resisting it.

I do have a triad of wonderful strong realized men in my quadro right now- unlike me- ususally always women!
Perhaps it was just as it seemed? Perhaps I always have had much male presence.
It has been helpful for me to understand through these men the male outlook, drives, and silliness (in a fun way) It seems to me men have the uncanny ability to act like boys ,and silly boys at that, at the drop of a hat. The female, particularly after childbirth and the responsibilies of motherhood, may lose some spontenaity (an understatement?)

The demands and defaults that if are not taken care of fall onto the mother. I have had a resurgence of play in my life and it is so life giving...I am a child again - but by choice , not because of a "second childhood" as in loss of memory or power.

How this realization impacts stress is very amazing, and I think this is why men are able to access this area...
1. They do not give birth
2. They internally understand that their boyhood was precious and keep it.

We as "responsible women" must realize this can keep us alive longer with greater enjoyment. Some are saying how do I play- I go to work everyday and give 110%- stop it
Don't give something you do not have to give. No one can last giving 110% or perhaps even initially give more than one has- It just feels that way-.

During a project that I managed but was not the team leader...I became the hero.

That is, when asked to become group leader I declined because I had already seen the lack of motivation (and, hehe, what felt like babysitiing) so I declined the position. A male of some responsibility in his department took on the job- we voted team leader. As it turned out he did not address the project until the week it was be..but gave comments on the work of others...while not contributing anything of himself. He was not part of the team, just the soverign of the project.

I had finished my piece, he had commented and we made some changes..I asked how his part was going (he did have an assigned part of the project) he quibbled and quabbeled around the question...as it turned out he got on it the week it was due with our work and his "brilliance". At 10:30pm the night before the project was due, I took a look at the powerPoint that accompanied the project and there was no format -double spacing, single spacing combined with bullet points, hash marks, outline style- and I e-mailed and asked out PowerPoint expert to put it in a finished format.

She called him, and he (as near as I could figure out from my conversation0 told the expert "we didn't have time for the formatting, we needed to move ahead with content"

I then did the PowerPoitn myself- last minute Hero save the project- make it look professional
But I resented it- My talky Talk was in gear- of course I elt him know that I had done my presentation and although I had other pressing concern I would do the presentation.

I e-mailed it to him and he finally agreed the group will use it...

I used this practice to let offf steam and missed a chapter meeting ODNSD- that had a great speaker- just to get level in my energy. Who lost? Him- no..Me- well maybe maybe not- only time will tell but I do regret missing the meeting because of my internal dialouge.

It works, my goal is to reqire less "evening out" time, or really, to not act the hero in the face of reactions of others.



 

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