Date:   10/3/2006 3:58:38 PM ( 18 y ago)
Hits:   6,734
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=747603

Absolutely, I can explain further.  Let me begin with my last six months' emotional jilts history, though, so we can reference it:

1.  April 2006

    - Began new, highly stressful job

    - Mom starts plans to adopt a 13 year old from Indonesia

2.  May 2006

    - Moved from family home to new job's location, 120 miles away.

    - Family home is in the VERY rural country (population 25), new home is in Vancouver, WA near downtown.

    - My brother and his wife (who is pregnant) move in.

3.  June 2006

    - Mom gets three new foster children (shocker!)

    - Brothers' children, 5 & 6 years old, move in with us

    - My big dog gets loose and nearly run over

    - Brother's sis-in-law arrives to help my sis-in-law

4.  July 2006

    - Found new 'cello instructor, started immediately.  LOTS of things to unlearn (frustration).

    - Found piano instructor for 5 year old, set date to start as end of July.

    - Father moves to Utah (!) to go to work. This leaves Mom at home by herself with a gob of foster kids.

    - Manuvered for a raise at work and received it

    - Children let my big dog loose and she's lost for 15 minutes

    - My 10 year old little dog begins vomitting for a whole night.  Vet tells me I should put her down.

    - Find solution for my little dog's peptic ulcer and she's fine

    - More of brother's in-laws arrive (his mom-in-law and sis-in-law)

5.  August 2006

    - Can not begin piano lessons, as my brother doesn't want to bother with them until school starts.

    - Lost house we wanted to buy to another buyer because our loan officer wasn't in the office and failed to tell us about a vacation he was taking.

    - New nephew is born.

    - Brother's sis-in-law leaves

6.  September 2006

    - Mom gets another foster child

    - Brother's sis-in-law leaves

    - My car dies, must borrow brother's car.  Repairs are estimated at $4k.

    - Niece isn't where she's supposed to be (lost to us) and we search for 30 minutes before we find her.


So, there's the reference of events, k?  Of note is that I don't like kids very much and really, really don't like babies.  I began pulling Sunflower oil the last week of August.

The Sunflower Oil did nothing for or against me.  After five weeks, I posted to the forum and it was suggested that I switch.  I chose Olive Oil at that time (8 days ago).

The first day of OO pulling (See September's list), I experienced emotions that were unrelated to what was happening around me.  Fear, anger, relief.  Shock, irritability, dismay.  Relief, sadness.  Irritability, shock, anger.  It was a rough day...

The next day  (See August's list), I experienced the same sort of thing throughout the day - emotions that were unrelated to what was going on in the present.  It felt a little like I was tuning out at times or dreaming during the day while awake (I think that is a more apropos description).  I experienced Relief, sadness.  Happiness, irratibility, resolution.  Irratibility, anger, dismay, shock.  Irratibility, disgust, anger.

The third day  (See July's list), I began looking closely at the correlation between these "dream emotions" and the history I've been experiencing recently.  I had read that sometimes, as your body cleanses itself of pain, it also clears the emotional trauma associated with the pain.  I started taking count of what happened (the list above) and correlated the days with the months.  After the first pull on the third day, my stomach began hurting, with strong "erruptions" of pain as the day went through.  Each time I OPd for the three I was doing in the morning, it got worse.  Throughout the day, I experienced irratibilty, fear (a lot of this), uncertainty, dismay, anger, lots more fear that lasted through the night.  I got headachy, my stomach hurt for no particular reason that I could figure out.  I figured maybe I was going through a toxin release, so I pulled three more times in the evening before dinner (no food for four hours previous, no liquids for the previous hour).

The fourth day (Continuation of July's list), I was still experiencing the fear and it had morphed into dread over... something that I couldn't put my finger on until I dreamed of Molly dying because I couldn't get the vomitting under control.  Aha!  So, as I pulled my oil that morning, I also performed Reiki on emotional self to see if I could get past it.  That worked and I was left feeling happy and contented for most of the remainder of the day.

My fifth day of Olive Oil pulling (see June's list), I've got listed as emotions:  intrepidation, uncertainty, fear again, reeling shock, and a lot of irratibility.  It matched with what happened in June.

The sixth day, I was expecting some of the dream-emotions.  And I got them.  Terror was at the top of my list, followed by fear, resolution, defeatedness.  That made sense when I matched it up to the timing of what was going on in my life, in an historical sense.  

Yesterday, I was not well, physically.  I had a pinched nerve or something like that making me nauseated.  I slept through most of the day.  Each time I awoke, I lost anything I had eaten.  I pulled oil a total of seven times.  The last time, I felt the release of a feeling/emotion that summed up my whole last week:  stress.  As it went, so did the pinched nerve.  It didn't completely go away, though.

Today, I am still experiencing the "pinched nerve" feeling and can still feel all sorts of unrelated emotions.  My stomach feels like how people describe an ulcer feels.  I've a headache.  Today's dream-emotions:  Uncertainty, fear, resolution, irritability, worn-out, stress.

There's nothing going on right now in life that merits any of the last weeks' emotions.  They're seemingly coming from nowhere, until you match up the last six months of emotional jilts in my life.  Then they seem to make sense...
 

<< Return to the standard message view

fetched in 0.02 sec, referred by http://www.curezone.org/forums/fmp.asp?i=747603