Date:   8/10/2005 10:47:17 PM ( 20 y ago)
Hits:   2,745
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=669086

Of course, forgiveness has therapeutic value for the victim, but it can also make the victim an UNWITTING accomplice in the future repitition of the offender's deed. Since the victim would become an UNWITTING accomplice, the victim could not be held accountable, but, realizing this, the victim does have a responsibility to all of humanity (and themselves) not to be an enabler and allow misdeeds to continue. When I do something that hurts someone's feelings or causes them inconvenience, I don't ask forgiveness, SINCE MY PRIORITY IS THEIR WELL BEING (NOT whether they forgive me or not, my forgiveness from God doesn't depend on them), I care about the consequences, pain and suffering they must endure and that I learn not to be so careless and clumsy. I am secure in my forgiveness from the Lord.

Each situation is different.

If someone wrongs me AND THEY ARE OF REPROBATE MIND, if I forgive them on the spot WITHOUT also teaching them remorse, then they will, almost assuredly, commit that same offense again either against myself (wrong me once, shame on you, wrong me twice, shame on me) or someone else.

Advising someone else to forgive the person who hurt them is not wrong (because it does have therapeutic value and is also a requirement of the Lord), but it is inconsiderate and uncompassionate because you are not showing sufficient respect for them and acknowledging what they have and will endure. It is up to them to eventually work things out properly with the Lord.

NEW Testament Christianity is all about PERSONAL relationships (with the Lord AND His children), not bureaucratic compliance and regimentation like the Pharisees. New Testament Christianity is a life led by the Spirit, not by the text (don't have a personal relationship with the bible).

 

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