Date:   8/7/2005 9:33:08 PM ( 19 y ago)
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URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=669049

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is that you are a human being and suffer consequences (the reason that matters is that you not only have a right to be happy, but a duty to yourself regardless of other people's indifference). Family is very important, it is our introduction to life. Family is how we learn to deal with and understand it ('it' meaning 'the people', people don't want to accept responsibility for mistreating the other person, so they choose to blame it on 'life', it's time to put a stop to that). Parents have a God-given responsibility to properly care for their children and very often selfishly neglect that responsibility (yes, that's the horrible realization of why there are so many young people in jail,...because they finally got caught giving back to the world what they got from it).

Right now you have enough to overcome, so for the near future, ease up on the idea of the marriage and children goal, that will come later, but right now, you don't need that extra pressure. Don't conform to society's or other people's expectations, what really matters now is YOUR happiness. Of course other people have a right to be happy, so don't infringe on their right UNJUSTLY (and you are qualified to be the judge of what is just, don't let other people dictate to you), but consider yourself on a mission from God to make your life meaningful and happy so that you can thank Him for life (consider that an obligation).

Don't HATE (or even let yourself become obsessed with being dissatisfied or disliking) your family, it's almost like a plant hating the ground it grew from. If you grow up hating (even ACTIVELY being dissatisfied with) your family, you will, psychologically, have low self-esteem and always do egotistical, stupid and crazy things to counteract and compensate for that).

All throughout life, people will attempt to convince you that they are qualified to give you advice (even though they are only spectators) and that you should consider yourself subordinate, needy, eager to please them, and submit to their advice. But you are only needy, subordinate, weak and stupid if you choose to think you are ("I think, therefore I am", the rule of human behavior).

A person only has a 'chip on their shoulder' if they seek revenge on society (people will label others as having a 'chip on their shoulder' for two reasons,...out of weakness to be compassionate and inability and unwillingness to respect anybody else's pain, and out of necessity (because if they let themselves care about you, they would not be able to accomplish their schemes), but you have a legitimate reason to be upset, you are a survivor (and have a 'survivor's wisdom' and can now be compassionate to other people because you can identify with others).

As for the car, all it really takes to be a good driver is patience and serenity. It is understandable that, right now, you are not overflowing with either, but, give it time and as you learn to get off your case, patience and serenity will not just be qualities, but attitudes.

By now, you might notice that it is not only your mother who makes trouble in your life, but that you have been conditioned to accept mistreatment from others too (realizing this is the only way to fully recover from the damage caused by family). People see that you are a 'thinker' and conscientious. So they will choose their words carefully in order to impose shame, guilt, humiliation and intimidation on you so that they can manipulate you (they want a piece of you, watch out for these 'predators', learn to recognize them).

So, stop thinking of yourself as a loser, you aren't, you're just not a juvenile delinquent that has run away or turned to a life of crime because life hasn't given you a family to be proud of. Instead of just becoming a bitter person and ending up in jail because you gave back to the world what you got from it, you have reacted to your situation sentimentally instead of just simply emotionally (your heart won't let you).



Get to know yourself.
Learn to love yourself and others will too (especially because you haven't conformed to society and become plastic). You will find that you are more 'real' than many people if you have the courage for introspection and discover yourself.

God bless you



 

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