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CoDependent, burnt out and unemployed too by #350 ..... Codependency & Addictive Relationships & Love Addiction

Date:   4/20/2004 11:19:56 PM ( 20 y ago)
Hits:   3,889
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=665819

****EXCUSE ME WHILE I VENT...I in case you can't figure it out I AM CODEPENDENT!!!

My husband is a paraplegic and we have a six-year old son. My husband was a paraplegic when I met him. Before we were married, he drank too much and was secretive and generally difficult to talk to. AFTER we were married he drank even more and started hanging out at night clubs. He got sloppy drunk at least twice a week and was often verbally abusive like to hang out freeloaders who always need a ride or money. He never like to tell me where he was going even if it was to the store. I was rarely if ever included when he went to social gathering nor was he interested in attending mine. He Hispanic and received a large settlement for his injury. He lost all the money on stocks but his family still believes he has money and he give it away almost whenever they ask. I am never told anything but find out when do the bills and see the bank statement. We were in a lot of debt but recently refinanced paid all the cards and already we owe money again.

Now he's his chronic pain has increased, he hardly ever gets out of bed, he eats in bed, does bowel care in bed and plays video games all day very loudly with surround sound, we don't go out nobody wants to visit. He's on heavy prescription drugs. Oxycodon, Percacet, Amitriptyline, Gabapentin in addition I go to the drug store and buy about 30 boxes of Sleepinal, Walsom or Unisom which he uses God nows how many a day with his medication to sleep.

I take responsibility for everything else all bills or any chores. He rarely bathes or brushes his teeth He ve been to 2 marriage counselors. I've filed for divorce twice. Whenever I get work or go to school I cannot count on him to pick up my son or even served him prepared meals. He may do it or he may not. He ignores everyone except when he need something brought to him so he won't move.


I AM BURNT OUT AND I'M MISERABLE. I HATE MY LIFE! I feel sorry for him and guilty but I don't want to be with him anymore. I don't have much energy left to give but I can't see myself doing this another year and now he plans to let my father-in-law move in to relocate to our state. I just got rid of his neice who found my atm card and to used it to withdraw $8000.00 from our account over a three month period, In addition to stealing $3,000 from her job as a cashier. Prior to that my sister and law and her daughter (same neice)said they wanted to relocate and ending up living with us for at least 2 months every time she got evicted. Which was at least twice a year for 3 years before I threatened to divorce him if he didn't sent them back home (East Coast), then I felt guilty and allowed the daughter (my neice to come back.)His youngest sister also moved in once because she was gang banging and his mom couldn't control her. So I do not want another in-law to move in especially his father who drinks heavly everyday and is rarely sober.

I have an appointment with a counselor next week. Thanks for allowing me to vent. In case you didn't get it I am codependent. Wish me luck.
 

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