Date:   1/26/2003 7:08:09 PM ( 21 y ago)
Hits:   1,282
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=61593

I agree with Anon.It seems that you are attracted to wounded,childish and self indulgent males. One of the usual reasons that women have for seeking them out is that you need to have a sense of CONTROL that comes from your attempts to 'straighten him out'. By choosing this kind of guy you get the opportunity to polish him up into the kind of partner that YOU want, then, you get to stay in control because you believe that he is renewed throught your efforts and was transformed by the power of your love- YOU MADE HIM WHOLE !Of course, this all fantasy and delusion because nobody has the kind of control over another. Notice how much power and control is in this process? THAT is the real issue here- this desire for control. Women who do this believe that a 'real' relationship is something that should emerge out of their struggle with a man -it has got to be tragic!.The struggle, the effort and all the turmoil is seen as a necessary lead up to the the 'Victory' which shows itself in a transformed compliant male. Nice guys do finish last with these women because there is no struggle required. The women have nothing to do!
This situation that you find yourself in is much more about you than it is about him and a stripper.I know that you want sympathy and compassion, but what you do need is awareness and insight into your own motives. You do need to get him out of your life and then take the steps to make sure that you transform YOURSELF so that you make better choices in the future...Good luck on the journey.
 

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