Date:   9/6/2004 9:33:02 AM ( 20 y ago)
Hits:   2,750
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=490963

hi andreas
i finished reading freedom from judgement a couple of days ago, and i am a little confused right now. but i have been confused before that anyway. i found a couple of things hard to accept because it was never part of my belief, but i know i dont have the answers in life, hence the new ideas presented by you make me think even more. for example reincarnation, and the part about jesus and you even mentioned his other name. i tried putting some of the less controversial ideas to two of my christian friends, but i guess they are less open minded. i even have a feeling they dont like it. but whether i believe that or not, there were issues mentioned that i know i had to confront

anyway, i have always known that i cant accept myself for who i am. i see myself as not pretty enough coz of my complexion , and hence i dont deserve to be loved..which is why i am in my early 20s and never in a relationship. i feel that i am selfish and not capable of loving too. i would turn down someone interested or i would try to avoid someone i like, to suppress my interest, and hopefully stop liking him altogether. i can only imagine those who are very comfortable with their bodies and themselves to be in a good relatioship. and if i were to enter one, i would only bring my insecurities into it, and make the guy miserable. but like everyone else, i want to experience that love and i really find it hard to believe that any guy can love me.. so many pretty girls around and its easier to like such girls

i believe i must have many hidden agendas, one of it certainly has something to do with my father. i had a good relationshp with him when young, then slowly there was a drift and today, i find him very nagging and somewhat irritating. i know he cares for me through his actions, but i find that somewhat suffocating and i get impatient with him. i dont even know why. i would really like to get to the roots of these problems by knowing my hidden agendas and 'release' them. how can i do that? it would be harder for me to know them if it involves a past life...

i share a relationship with jesus where i tell him my feelings, but have been confused lately after reading your book and have not spoken to him the same style i used to..it feels a little weird and i felt a voice(me or him?) saying that i changed but he is still the same. i have had beautiful encounters in prayer when i cry uncontrollably (dont know why) and felt very light and good atfer that and experienced vision of him telling me to return to him, at a point in life when i hardly regarded my religion. i took him as lord and saviour but i think you mentioned that jesus isnt above us..so its a bit strange with that thought in my head

sorry for long post, but what can i do to help myself.. esp in the area of acceptance and opening my heart???

i am really glad i read your book though.. i was thinking this afternoon and thought, i cant figure this out and i may never figure it out, but whatever the case, to love is never wrong,its universal, but even in that i have a problem... thank you anyway for the book..it showed me new perspective and help me 'clicked' in certain areas...

thank you
 

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