Date:   1/26/2005 1:25:28 AM ( 20 y ago)
Hits:   2,895
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=411975

Yeah, well, what human beings are supposed to do is...
LIVE (not just experience life, but FEEL aLIVE).

For a human being, the definition of the word "LIFE" is:

EXPERIENCING everything that life has to offer (emotionally).

The two basic emotions are:
Happiness and IT'S OPPOSITE----sadness (and PAIN, package deal, one can't be understood or felt properly without a proper undersrstanding of the other).

You don't need to be "fixed", in fact, you mentioned in your post that you FEEL alive when you cut. The same reason that the songbird sings (in THIS CASE), is the reason why 'the human being cuts'. You have been listening to everybody tell you what they understand (they can't understand because they are only spectators and have never experienced 'sorrows and pains'). You yourself have realized why you do it, but other peoples' (professionals) "know it all" explanation of needing to be "fixed" is misleading and distracts you from the truth. Trust your instinct, that's the first step to a solution (understanding the problem CORRECTLY).


This is not a 'coping mechanism' for a 'SICKO' mind, YOU ARE NOT A SICKO, but it is not exactly proper behavior either. People in Africa cut themselves, but that is for tribal identity ('cutting' is not such a drastically irregular thing to do), you do it as a habit because the act itself is meaningful to you. I would say "What are you punishing yourself for?", but are you 'PUNISHING' yourself? FOR WHAT?...something, no doubt it is something that you blame yourself for, but what? Only you can answer that. I grew up being suicidal (which I know you're not) but never believed in suicide, so I just gave up on life and became a workaholic so that I could just work my life away. Did you give up on life and go one step further by becoming self-denigrating and self-destructive?


The closer two people are to each other, the more they live vicariously through each other, meaning they want to be able to feel responsible for each others' happiness, and they also want to be able to feel justified for each others' sadness.

You imagine that other people would be happy that you are sad, and so, SUBCONSCIOUSLY, you satisfy them (or imagine that you do) by 'cutting' yourself (you also imagine yourself as satisfying 'justice' and therefore 'punish' yourself. You want to feel responsible for their happiness, so you satisfy them by punishing yourself. BUT, you shouldn't want to be responsible for anybody elses' enjoyment of life (that's their responsibility to themselves). It's good to be compassionate and care enough to HELP other people, but not to such an extent that you disregard and trample your own human right of happiness (do not be a doormat).


'YOU' live vicariously through others to a [GREAT] fault. Now that you understand, maybe you can begin the healing.

It is unlikely that professionals or anybody else will ever be able to understand yourself as well as yourself. Trust your instinct, believe in yourself. Happiness is not only for OTHER people, happiness belongs to you also. You are welcome on this earth and you BELONG. If you had a friend that cut themselves, would you object?

STOP.

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Yeah, well, what human beings are supposed to do is...
LIVE (not just experience life, but FEEL aLIVE).

For a human being, the definition of the word "LIFE" is:

EXPERIENCING everything that life has to offer (emotionally).

The two basic emotions are:
Happiness and IT'S OPPOSITE----sadness (and PAIN, package deal, one can't be understood or felt properly without a proper undersrstanding of the other).

You don't need to be "fixed", in fact, you mentioned in your post that you FEEL alive when you cut. The same reason that the songbird sings (in THIS CASE), is the reason why 'the human being cuts'. You have been listening to everybody tell you what they understand (they can't understand because they are only spectators and have never experienced 'sorrows and pains'). You yourself have realized why you do it, but other peoples'(professionals) "know it all" explanation of needing to be "fixed" is misleading and distracts you from the truth. Trust your instinct, that's the first step to a solution (understanding the problem CORRECTLY).


This is not a 'coping mechanism' for a 'SICKO' mind, you are not a SICKO, but it is not exactly proper behavior either. People in Africa cut themselves, but that is for tribal identity ('cutting' is not such a drastically irregular thing to do), you do it as a habit because the act itself is meaningful to you. I would say "What are you punishing yourself for?", but are you 'PUNISHING' yourself? FOR WHAT?...something, no doubt it is something that you blame yourself for, but what? Only you can answer that. I grew up being suicidal (which I know you're not) but never believed in suicide, so I just gave up on life and became a workaholic so I could just work my life away. Did you give up on life and go one step further by becoming self-denigrating and self-destructive?


The closer two people are to each other, the more they live vicariously through each other, meaning they want to be able to feel responsible for each others' happiness, and they also want to be able to feel justified for each others' sadness.

You imagine that other people would be happy that you are sad, and so, SUBCONSCIOUSLY, you satisfy them (or imagine that you do) by 'cutting' yourself (you also imagine yourself as satisfying 'justice' and therefore 'punish' yourself. You want to feel responsible for their happiness, so you satisfy them by punishing yourself. BUT, you shouldn't want to be responsible for anybody elses' enjoyment of life. It's good to be compassionate and care enough to HELP other people, but not to such an extent that you disregard and trample your own human right of happiness.


'YOU' live vicariously through others to a [GREAT] fault. Now that you understand, maybe you can begin the healing.

It is unlikely that professionals or anybody else will ever be able to understand yourself as well as yourself. Trust your instinct, believe in yourself.
 

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