Date:   4/19/2005 11:02:21 AM ( 19 y ago)
Hits:   1,448
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=370501

Maggie it sounds to me like the eating disorder may be manifesting feelings of lonliness. Could it be that you could maybe be using the disorder as a means for getting attention that friends and parents are not giving you? Maybe not but thats what it kinda sounds like from a psychological standpoint.

I was bulimic for 4 years. About two ago I really really wanted to get better so I told my mom after hiding it for 4 years. After a week of healthy eating I started to collect water in my feet and tummmy so much that I gained about 15 lbs of water. I didnt know what to do so I called my doctor and she told me to go to the hospital- NOW! Luckily I did because my electrolytes were so off balance that I was about to have a heart attack. This was just the beginning of my problems. Throwing up put such a stress on my liver that about a year ago I got so sick. I am still sick with liver chirrosis and I am only 20!! My blood pressure is low and there is only a 50% chance that I am going to recover from this. I cant do anything but lay on the couch all day because too much moving around makes me faint, and I might go into a coma. I have brain damage that might be reversable but it will take a few months until I know for sure. And to think, I did all of this to be thin. Why couldn't I just love myself? I love myself now, but why did it take a near death experience for me to figure this out?

I beg of you- the damage that eating disorders do to you are so much worse than any benefit you may get from controling yourself. Talk to someone so you can get behind what is really causing the disorder- doesn't have to be a parent but someone anonymous at the campus psychological health place. Seriously, I dont want you to have to lose your life like I have. Please. If you want to talk to me you can email me at caligurl1426@aol.com I know what you are going through.
 

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