Re: I need advice. This is a bit tricky. by alikat ..... Relationship Forum # 1 [Archive]
Date: 6/10/2003 12:36:24 PM ( 21 y ago)
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URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=331287
I think it's very sad that nowdays it is so important to have to prove that one is open minded and that all can be tolerated. If there's any show of weakness or intolerance in any area then the person is automatically closed minded and insecure. In my 'humble' opinion, this is a bunch of crock.
In a relationship, trust and fidelity are essential, and this faithfulness is not limited to the material/physical alone. We have minds and spirits. When you begin paying with things like making mention of the attributes of someone outside the relationship you are crossing boundaries that shuld have never been crossed, and now you are both paying the consequences.
He gets hurt when you say "Wow, he's hot", but if he were to admit it to you, then in your and his own estimation he might be insecure and narrow minded. He goes on about what he would do to another hoping you would say "I only want you thinking that way of me", but of course you might never say that.
It's obvious that this is a very good relationship and that you both know it and cherish it, therefore bringing these dangerous elements can be very destructive in the long run and definitely not worth it. Why don't both of you agree to wipe the slate clean of this stuff, promise that you will just keep eyes on each other (at least while in front of each other) and continue adding all that builds, edifies and brings in the good, positive and constructive into what you already have.
Blessings.
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