Date:   6/27/2004 7:43:22 PM ( 20 y ago)
Hits:   1,091
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=266608

I just went into the archives of this site. It's been almost a year since I've been here. If I had cancer or some other disease I would have immediately quit eating doing the incurables program. I was pregnant and thought I would try to find a loving, caring OBGYN, My conclusion MD is in direct conflict with loving and caring. I will spare you the horror details of my miscarriage. I'll tell you what went wrong and what I innately would have done, to achieve the same results. I turned 40 and found out I was pregnant. A little shocked but my husband and I were ecstatic. Life is a journey and we opened our arms to this experience. I tried to get in for early prenatal care. They don't even want to consider seeing you until your in your 3rd month, regardless of your age. So we see the Nurse Practitioner I've been spotting a few days. She is desperately trying to hear a heatbeat and rockin and rollin in places only my husband should be in or I. So we go for our ultra sound, now we're not young, we've experienced life. We know we probably won't see a heartbeat, we're hopeful but not hysterical. I tried everything to lighten the tech up, she was like a race horse at the gate, totally oblivious to me, the patient! I do not know who designed the vaginal wand, I'll assume it was a man. A woman would have made it flexible to prevent what happened next. It is about 14 inches long with the handle. Because she was clearly a wreck because there was no heartbeat, she was unconscious and rammed that thing so far into me I kicked her arm with my knee trying to get away from her. I wish I would have slapped her. So I believe it was intentional to start the process. She didn't kill the baby, she initiated very powerfully the bleeding and miscarriage. We were fine. She wasn't, I comforted her. I believe she was distracted and distant because she knew what she had to do and that is hurt me. Others I've spoken with that had a heartbeat felt no pain. The woman that had no heartbeat were brutalized. So we go home to experience a pretty horrible thing at 10 1/2 weeks pregnant. They told me it would be intense, offered no drugs, told me to take advil. So once again alone in a bathroom a woman goes through hell. A hell I believe no man would ever tolerate. No drugs is common also, thank you Medicine. Some bullshit about the grieving process. Honey I don't need more experience with grief, I lost a 4 year old in 1986. IN fact the MD office gave me a book, "too soon a memmory", Written by a friend of mine. So comatose would have been my preferred state, for about an hour. Oh then they want you to find the fetus. LOLOLOLOL Get angry when you don't find it. If it were so important why didn't you spare me the horror and go get it. Oh that's right the grief process. A well meaning patriarchal MD would have said, "Honey you don't need to go through this we'll take care of this." That would have been preferred to this.
WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN INNATE HAD WE BEEN LEFT ALONE. WHAT I BELIEVE SCHULZE WOULD HAVE BEEN HONEST ENOUGH TO SAY. I KNOW WHEN THERE IS A DEATH, I WANT TO MAKE LOVE. I ALSO KNEW, INTUITION, THE BABY WAS GONE. I KNOW EXACTLY WHEN IT'S SOUL LEFT. MAKING LOVE TO MY HUSBAND WOULD HAVE HAD THE SAME EFFECT. WHY AREN'T THEY HONEST. NOBODY WAS HONEST WITH US! THE NURSE PRACTITIONER COULD HAVE SAID, " HEY WE CAN HELP THIS ALONG OR YOU CAN GO HOME AND MAKE LOVE. IF YOUR MISCARRYING IT WILL BRING IT ON IF NOT IT WON'T EFFECT IT." DO THINGS WITH LOVE BEING THE INTENTION. IT WOULDN'T BE HELL, IT WOULD BE INCREDIBLE. IT MAKES NO SENSE TO BE AROUND PREGNANT WOMEN ON A DAILY BASIS AND BE AFRAID TO TALK ABOUT MISCARRIAGE. IT WOULD BE LIKE ME BEING AFRAID TO TALK ABOUT DEATH. I DO HOSPICE WORK, I WORK IN NURSING HOMES. I ASK PATIENTS DAILY, 80 YEAR OLDS COME TO ME A FULL CODE. "HEY JOE IF I CAME IN HERE AND FOUND YOU NOT BREATHING AND NO HEARTBEAT WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?" MOST SAY, "BURY ME." HE JUST BECAME A NO CODE. I CAN NOT TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES I WRITE CUREZONE.COM ON A PIECE OF PAPER, Schulze Forum I KNOW IF THEY WANT IT THEY WILL FIND ME I'VE LED LOTS OF HORSES TO WATER I CAN'T MAKE THEM DRINK. NOW I POINT THE WAY AND IF THEY'RE SERIOUS THEY COME TO ME WITH MORE QUESTIONS. BUT IT'S SO HARD TO LET GO OF MEDICINE COMPLETELY. FOR ME I'VE BEEN HURT MORE BY MEDICINE THAT HELPED. THIS MAY BE THE STRAW THAT BROKE THE CAMELS BACK. I REMEMBER 2 PATIENTS I'VE HAD ONE WAS 86 YEARS YOUNG HADN'T BEEN TO A DR. FOR 40 YEARS, SHE HAD A BANDAID ON HER LEFT BREAST. I ASKED HER WHAT WAS UNDER IT AND SHE SAID OH A SCAB I'VE HAD FOR YEARS. I TOOK THE BANDAID OFF AND THERE WAS A TUMOR, CLASSIC TEXTBOOK ORANGE PEEL SKIN, BREAST TUMOR. I THINK ABOUT HER TODAY AND I LAUGH. SHE MAY HAVE LIVED LONGER AT HOME, NOT IN THE HOSPITAL. ANOTHER ONE SAME THING ONLY 70'S AND NOT BEEN TO THE DR FOR YEARS. SHE OWNED THE 1ST HEALTHFOOD STORE IN HER COUNTY. I LOVED TALKING TO HER, I FOUND HER FASCINATING. I JUST READ HER OBITUARY THE OTHER DAY.
THE PAIN I HAVE NOW IS FROM THE ULTRASONOGRAPHER, NOT THE MISCARRIAGE AND MY HUSBAND WOULDN'T HAVE HURT ME LIKE THIS.
SO GOOD BYE MD'S, OH I'LL STILL GET A PAYCHECK FROM WHEREVER I WORK. BUT MY MONEY WON'T GENERATE ANYMORE BARBARISM. MY PHYSICIAN IS GOD, I'LL SIT BACK MEDITATE AND COME UP WITH THE MOST INNATE THING TO DO. I WILL NEVER LET ANOTHER PERSON HURT ME IN THE NAME OF MEDICINE AGAIN. I'LL COME UP SWINGING.
I'M SUPPOSE TO GO TO THE DR. NEXT FRIDAY MAKE SURE IT'S ALL OUT, SO WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN A ONE DAY ORDEAL TURNS INTO A WEEK AND A HALF ORDEAL.
SO ANYBODY KNOW OF AN HERB TO MAKE ME CRAMP MORE TO REALLY CLEAN THIS OUT. TO END UP WITH A D&C ANYWAY, THAT WOULD WOULD JUST BE HYSTERICAL IN A VERY SAD, WEIRD, HYSTERICALLY FUNNY IRONIC ORDEAL WITH MEDICINE.
I'M SORRY I RAMBLED, I READ SCHULZE STUFF IN THE ARCHIVES AND BELIEVE THIS BELONGS HERE. THE EVERYBODY READ THIS (X-RATED) I LOVE THIS GUY. WE DON'T AGREE ON SEX ISSUES, BECAUSE I COULD HAVE MORE THAN ONE. WE ARE NOT ALL THE SAME........
 

<< Return to the standard message view

fetched in 0.03 sec, referred by http://www.curezone.org/forums/fmp.asp?i=266608