Date:   12/12/2015 4:10:37 PM ( 9 y ago)
Hits:   2,788
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=2292006

saying something is not the same as meaning it

there is a difference between wishing your wife liked sex more, so that you could have sex with her on a repeated and regular basis, any time you want it

and having no desire, unless it is inspired desire, which is extremely rare

your desire is independent of your wife's desire, and that is why the intimacy is missing in your relationship

this is obviously true because you will go out and get yourself some sex from somebody else, if your lover is not willing to avail herself for a while

when a woman recommends that a man go out and take care of his sexual needs, it is because she is exasperated with him trying to make her take responsibility for them, when she isn't even turned on

it is an act of desperation and hopelessness
it means she has given up on ever being able to enjoy sex with you
and she is willing to do anything to get you off her back about it

i am not advocating the sacrifice of sex, nor do i recommend using grouchiness to get it, the solution is to learn how to be a better lover so you can turn your wife on and inspire her to have sex with you

in order to do that, most need to gain skill and confidence, which can only come from practice, so you will need a lover, and one who can teach you these things

when you went out and had sex elsewhere and told her about it, was it a healing and educational experience, or was it just hedonistic indulgence because you were exasperated and desperate for sex anywhere you could get it, since your wife doesn't want any?

telling the wife "i don't want anybody but you" is a no shit sherlock by virtue of the fact that you married her

but marrying for the opportunity to have sex on a repeated and regular basis is a recipe for failure because then the poor spouse will always feel obligated to do her duty and never have the opportunity to feel inspired

sex that is not inspired gets boring and dull very quickly







 

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