Date:   10/9/2015 5:39:29 PM ( 9 y ago)
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URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=2281278

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If it makes any difference, I am vowing to go on another fast. I don't see any practicality in this until I come home from school tomorrow and see whether I eat or not. Tomorrow is Saturday, so my family will be going to a restaurant. A Chinese vegan restaurant. Last week, I was able to not eat at the restaurant by writing in my diary that I will kill myself if I ate again. It didn't last the second day but I am just grateful that I skipped the restaurant meal. I am not really going to kill myself, I was just desperate. Plus knowing that I will never kill myself makes me have to honor this not eating threat. I am a very optimistic and rational person, so there is no way I will attempt to kill myself.

Tomorrow is a special buffet at the restaurant with 100% more variety of food than normal buffets. I will definitely use my killing myself threat for the restaurant. I will just go there to hang out with old friends and still have a good time. Well, I am running out of ideas for how to not eat, and if the threat can help me not eat for one meal, I will use it. I have been dealing with this problem for years. Still the same old, same old. I am just grateful I only eat one meal a day usually, even though I feel I have overeaten during this one meal. I am beginning to have spleen and stomach problems, confirmed by more than one healer.

I really don't know what to say to make myself not eat for an extended amount of time. They do say being addicted to food has the same neural pathways as being addicted to heroine. I am just going to end with an I love you all. :D kisses, hugs, gazing in to your eyes calmly, giving you a shoulder rub, purrs on your lap, head butts, and kisses again for an hour
 

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