Date:   4/4/2013 5:36:28 AM ( 11 y ago)
Hits:   11,201
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=2051903

Amber I feel your pain. You are experience the awful tolerance withdrawals, I never new what it was till about a month ago, I kept thinking it was 'adrenal crashes'

I have suffered AF for years, have tried an asssortment of antidepressants, then after a few failed protocols and money spent with Dr Lam my sleep became worse and worse my doctor put me on valium. Only a low dose...however over the forthcoming months I kept crashing more and more reguarly, then three times a week. I had no idea what was happening and kept blaming my adrenals. The drugs where making me tired, blunted emotionally, losing mass amounts of weight, my memory was gone..it was awful. It was tolerance withdrawal. Thankfully in some ways im glad I didnt figure this out as I would of starting to take more pills just to stabalise! I knew I had to get off the pills though.

After a severe crash at Christmas (which now i realised was because i had taken no valium for a week) I came off cold turkey as I knew nothing and my GP said it would be fine. Then the hell began. Since January I have been through siezures, convulsions, severe panic attacks - sometimes up to 12 times a day, blood Sugar problems (all day on a daily basis), muscle cramping, crying all day and a night, severe anxiety and adrenaline rushes, absolutely no sleep at all, blurred vision, no coordination, tremours, internal shaking..the list is endless. The pain became so bad in my back I couldnt move for weeks and had to just stay in bed going through the trauma. The first time my back locked up I lay on the bathroom floor for over 24 hours because I couldnt move and thought my discs had gone. I lost over a stone..and still I was blaming my adrenals, then after some research I realised that over the past three months since going on valium the crashes were actually tolerance withdrawal and now I was/am in the acute withdrawal stage.

My story is benzo buddies under Dubjam in the introductions section if you want to have a read. Its been 11 weeks now since my last benzo and pharmaceutical (I was only on them for three months, 3-4 times a week, 5-10mg valium) and although im through the acute withdrawal stage and my emotions have stabalised I am still suffering greatly with 24/7 anxiety and adrenaline surges, I cant even eat without it 'revving me' up and blood Sugar is only stable for around three hours. I have a little more energy and a brighter outlook but its still a trauma just trying to get through the days, However I am determined to see it out and get through this as I have come this far and the sucess stories on the benzo buddies website keeps me going. I try to walk everyday but its such a fine line of helping the WD but not setting off my adrenals - I always know when ive gone to far as I begin to feel my pulse in feet and my evening anxiety will go through the roof.

I think its possibly the best thing you can do to come off them - they mess everything up, there is no way to heal while letting them control your body. Look at Professor Ashtons manual, and study the tapering solutions on her forum, water tiration seems the more gentle option.

What I have realised is AF is a wall in the park compared to acute and protracted benzo withdrawal, ill never hate day to day AF as much ever again, and getting through this has made me more convinced I can overcome AF as well.
 

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