Spath as parents by #68716 ..... Narcissism/Sociopathy Survivors Forum
Date: 10/9/2012 4:15:01 AM ( 12 y ago)
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URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1994445
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I'm reading that you're unhappy in your marriage and that you have two children with your husband. I understand the fear of severing a marriage when children are invovled. But, I can tell you one truth that is ugly: your children are learning how to be victims or predators, themselves, by watching and absorbing the dynamics of this "family."
Why are you resorting to manipulations to get simple needs met? Manipulations are toxic no matter who's having to resort to employing them, and for whatever circumstances. And, your children are learning this behavior, as well - to manipulate to get needs met.
With all due respect, remaining in an abusive, toxic relationship "because of the children" is an excuse, not a reason. Many, many people out there raise their children on their own, with no support from the DNA donor, and do a good job. I used to be under the horribly mistaken belief that a child "needs" both of its parents in order to develop into a healthy, productive, successful adult. Well, this is simply not true, especially when one parent is abusive and fits the profile of a sociopath.
If you are unhappy, do something about it, or not. But, don't use your children as an excuse to remain in a situation that is going to ruin their chances at being successful adults because of fear of being alone, etc. You see, in the World of Abuse and Sociopaths, children (as are all other human beings) are completely expendable. They can be replaced. They are nothing more than tools and objects. They are unimportant unless they can be used as leverage or manipulations. Never let yourself believe that your children aren't only suffering because basic needs aren't being met - they are also being formed, molded, and shaped into victims or abusers, themselves. And, they are watching you and your spouse. They are absorbing the behaviors and dynamics, and they will develop their own core issues that either cause them to make very, very poor choices throughout their lifetimes, or they will have their empathy and humanity destroyed and develop into abusive sociopaths, themselves.
For more information on abuse and sociopathy, visit:
I wish you the very best
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