Re: Im close again by #91249 ..... Suicide Confessions Forum
Date: 1/4/2010 4:34:17 PM ( 14 years ago ago)
Hits: 3,838
URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1549531
thanks mate what you say really hits the nail on the head, ive been trying to readjust my head these past few weeks, slowly abit at a time my main problem is that i hate myself, hate the way i look(even though i know im a decent looking guy compared to most thats not big headed as it doesnt obviously do me any favours mentally if im having self-esteem problems.
I could be perfect and id still find something to fixate on and hate, no wonder my adrenals are nailed ontop of everything else.
but those words are similar to what a friend said and they really do help, like you say i wont heal with these type of thoughts. When you get this low though its hard to get out this horrible loop i guess and with police ontop of my problems its no wonder im abusing drink and drugs.
but i have to get out this loop with alcohol again ive sat smelling the bottle all day and bang 10pm i give up whats the point in even drinking at this time. I can do months without drink if i have a cheeky smoke of marijuana but that over-stimulates teh adrenals to high heaven also. Going cold turkey i last a day or two if lucky then start feeling depressed. If i could go to the gym or boxing or even out to all the friends who have abandoned me it would be better than sitting from 11am till 2 at night refreshing the same 4 websites all day drive a sane man nuts lol.
thanks again yall:), its great that we have places like curezone, at times i dont think their healthy for me but in the right context like these posts they can be my savior.
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