Date:   9/26/2009 6:20:49 PM ( 15 y ago)
Hits:   1,904
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1497445

what im good at? pretty much nothing. the way i see it is if i cant be 100% at what im doin, i dont see the point in learning what im doin. there are lots of things that i love to do. ive been this kind of person since i was a child if it is 2 hard, i wont do it. however, i have no probs playing video games that are hard, but anything else i wont do it. ive never been the kind of person who enjoys challenges, i always took the easy way out of things.

for example, i want to build up my skills in web design. i know i am lacking in a few areas that need to be worked on. i keep repracticing that failed area only to be failing yet again. i was telling my bf if u cant learn somethin at a normal level like everybody else, then ur gonna be like why even learn? he agreed.

like i said before, everything i tried to learn never stays in my long term memory, everything stays in my short term to the point i dont even remember what i just learned. it takes me a long time to remember things, i used to have a photographic memory now i am pissed off cuz ppl who can function normally and who have a photographic memory can easily swing by life easily.

my ex gf's brother has ADD and he has a very photographic memory. he can see things once and has no probs reciting what hes read or do somethin hands on like hes a pro at it - which makes me super jealous.

if u told me to read 3 chapters of something and have me come back 2 days later to recite what i learn, i can only recite some things and cant remember the rest. ask me questions about those 3 chapters, i cant even understand the questions or if i do answer them, my answers dont come out as clear and precise - they are jumble up words. when i speak, i dont start from the beginning. i start from the end, middle, then beginning and thats why ppl seem to get confused cuz they dont know where 2 start from when i am tellin them a story. ppl look at me like im stupid!

another example is i was learning somethin hands on and i saw what i needed to do. i got excited doin it and when i get to the last part in the instructions, everything shut down it got 2 hard and i didnt wanna do it. even if i reread the instruction book 4 times, i ended up making the same mistake over and over again. even i had a teacher help me and i still didnt get what the teacher was saying - again teacher felt like i was stupid.

u see, there is nothin documented but i do know somethin is wrong with me. i cant tell my instructors at school whats the problem nor can i tell any potential employer my problem.
 

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