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Re: feel suicidal - have morgellons by #120277 ..... Suicide Confessions Forum

Date:   9/12/2009 11:36:57 PM ( 14 years ago ago)
Hits:   5,939

Your post really sounds familar to me. I developed something that I believed was morgellons 11 years ago. At that time there was barely one website about this disease. After about 1 and a half years I cured myself. During that time I went through a nightmare. I tried everything. Herbs, creams, pesticides, doctors, vitamins, etc. I even dipped my hair in boiling water, and slathered mineral oil all over my body. I sat in sulfur mixed with vaseline for 3 days. Nothing worked, my whole life revolved around the horrific itching I suffered everyday. I also had the fibers, crystals and a few small lesions. I examined stuff under the microscope.

I started to feel better when I did 2 things at the same time, so I dont know which one worked. I took several doses of ivermectin over a 2 month period. The first 2 doses came from the doctor. At the same time I took baths EVERY night in salt water for about 3 months. I would buy 40 lb. bags of water softener salt and put several cups in till the water seemed saltier than the ocean by taste. Sometimes I would add citric acid as an acidifier. I soaked for 30 minutes or as long as I could, and kept my hair under water as much as possible. Then I would towel dry and NOT rinse off all night. Shower in the morning. I figured this way the salt would be on me all night and be more effective.

Then finally I started to get some relief. I felt itchy still but my skin was so messed up from all of the junk I put on it before. e.g. permrethrin, lindane!! (I think that was what made me the sickest)

I was not normal again for a very long time (9 months) but I was better, and I may still be suffering if I had not done the baths and ivermectin. It was truly a horrifying experience and I wanted to commit suicide. I didnt think the itching would ever stop. I voluntarity committed myself to the psych ward with the mistaken belief that someone would help me in the hospital. I was treated terribly by doctors who wanted me to believe it was all in my head. Definately not!

I dont have much to offer in the form of positive stuff since I am in the same boat. No longer Morgellons but the life I have now is just as bad. Maybe my story with Morgellons can be of some help to you.

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