It's been 20 years & I am weary! by cashcreators ..... Marriage Support Forum
Date: 8/1/2009 10:29:06 PM ( 15 y ago)
Hits: 3,545
URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1466168
In 1989 I married a woman who had three kids from a previous marriage. Thanks to me, we are still married. I left her in 1993...but only for two weeks. I have been thru hell with her not allowing me to have a voice in the home.
(We have never had any children together)
For the last 20 years now, she has refused to allow me to "say anything to her kids as far as correction" goes. All three kids are out of the home now. Her youngest is 24 years old with a child of her own (4 years old).
I have known my wife since 1980! I was best friends with her ex husband actually. We dated for one year (in 1988)before we married. After we married....she changed. She has never been the same woman I dated .....since.
I was raised with a strict Father. I was taught you don't allow children OR teenagers to "back talk" adults; especially their parents. My wifes kids have always back talked her & this has always drove me crazy!
Right now, her youngest (24 yrs) daughter is the biggest problem!!!! No matter what she does, I am NOT ALLOWED to speak out & try to talk some sense into her, or her Mother will yell & get angry with me. Her Daughter KNOWS this & uses this to control me.
In fact, in 2007, her Daughter got SO MAD at me & refused to allow me to see my step-grand daughter for several months...only because of this:
I told her to "please take her laundry home with her tonight, because it has been sitting here for 2 weeks now".
That was it! That was all I said. To get even with me, my grand baby didn't get to see me for several months.
What did my wife do about this?
Nothing! As long as her Daughter allowed the child to come over during the day while I was at work, that was all she cared about.
Read on.........
Her youngest daughter moved out in 2004, but has been a burden to us ever since. Here's how:
* she's VERY lazy!
* she won't work a job
* IF she actually gets a job, she gets fired within a month
* She does a terrible job of taking care of her now 4 year old daughter
* she doesn't want anyone telling her "what to do"
* she has "attempted" suicide 4 or 5 times since 2003
* she once moved back in our home (with her two dogs & child) with no job for 5 months
* she never offers to help prepare a meal when she's here
* she never offers to help clean up here
* she rarely cleans up after her daughter here
* she feels the world owes her a living
* I had to REMIND her to buy her own Mother something on Mother's day....she forgot anyways
* two of my Wife's kids (30 & 32)forgot their Mothers birthday this year
I could go on & on....
I love my wife VERY MUCH, however, I feel like I want to move out & get my own place. My wife has NO problem with "clutter" around the house...as for me; this drives me crazy & depresses me!
She is no slob (like her lazy daughter) though.
I am tired of being in a voice-less marriage. I have NEVER done the following:
* hit my wife
* cheated on my wife
* been in trouble with the law
* abused any of her children or grand children
sexually,physically, or mentally.
* never smoked ANYTHING
* never drank or been drunk
* always worked two (and sometimes three) jobs
Okay, I can say much more here, but I need to hear from you folks! Should I leave her or stay?
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