Date:   1/23/2004 10:52:36 PM ( 20 y ago)
Hits:   4,815
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=138336

Good Job Tracey! YOur talents never cease to amaze me. Behold the levels of accuracy from this card you chose: (You talked to my Higher Self that is so coool!)

A card of Nourishment- My illness is related to malabsorbtion of foods because I am afraid of food and being fat since I was 7 years old. I actually hate food, so I am not getting nourishment from it--just gas.

Believing in my healing- My Mom says everyday that I am improving, but I always feel like its not enough or its not any better which makes me sabatoge the whole thing. I feel like oh I am still sick so who cares... that kind of thing.

Of course I know in my brain all that, but feelings are so powerful!

Yes, Separation from GOD!!!! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, that is going to make me cry. It comes back to the Empath thing really. When I was a kid the empathy gifts were my way of communicating with the Creator. To me, I felt chosen and special. As life changed, parents split, Dad betrayed and disowned me, I grew angry. I let go of the empathy and shut God out. I have discussed this with myself many times that the change in my relationship w/ God is no doubt detremental to my physical being. I have not been able to feel forgiven by Him maybe? It was me who left.


Resistance to positive change- that is what I question every single second of every day, "Why do I sabatage my healing!" I know I should eat fruits and veggies, and I eat chocolate chip cookies and stress my liver. I had a problem with binging and purging that really ruins your body. I still fall back into the pattern occassionally. Working so Hard at this. Its all about FEAR. I figured that out, but FEAR is nothing but separation from God, right? I hate fear.

My Rational Side putting away negative experience- I always do that. I have selective amnesia. I act rationally always and never cry (except at movies). (Studying to be a doctor, seeing lots of blood, cadavers, etc, you can become deadened to your emotions.) Its unhealthy.

White Iris-? That I am not sure of, but with the way I am , I bet one grows on my lawn this spring or something like that. Signs make me smile.

I am going to do the exercise, "I am growing in love". Yes, I can feel it soothing my aches already like warm bubblebath or fluffy blanket hugging me. I am sure this is the right way to go. Can you believe how far we have come since my first reading? Wooooh, I really needed help! I can't thank you enough.

More tomorrow,
Gracey
 

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