Re: Was it rape? by StratRebel ..... Rape Survivors Support Forum
Date: 12/23/2008 12:18:46 PM ( 16 y ago)
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URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1321153
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"Alcohol makes people do things they normally wouldn't. It impairs higher reasoning abilities/communication and allows animal instincts to come to the fore. You could chalk it up to him being drunk or maybe its part of a larger pattern"
I agree with most of what you said EXCEPT this. I have a very distinct view against the quoted statement. Alcohol is NEVER an excuse for ANYTHING. Alcohol does not MAKE you do anything. All it does is lower brain safeguards against you doing stupid things, but you still know at the time right from wrong. NEVER "chalk up" something to being drunk. Being drunk in the first place was a choice, and is never an excuse for your actions.
Now, for the original question. I would agree with the first response, by the definition it was rape. How you proceed about it is completely up to you. Did it affect how you see him? Did it influence the relationship? Would he ever do it again? If the answer is yes to any of those, I would give some deep thought to whether you are where you are supposed to be.
If you truly love someone, you would NEVER do anything to intentionally hurt them. Alcohol or not.
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