Date:   10/18/2008 3:00:07 PM ( 17 y ago)
Hits:   4,963
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1279783

I want to thank both of you for your very kind and supportive responses. It sucks that so many people are victimized in many ways that hurt so much. I think the point made about finding a girlfriend at this point could attract the wrong type with bad intentions. I really don't want to be victimized again. I have to keep my focus on healing and I hope the rest falls into place. the emotional pain is the hardest part for me to deal with right now. I have this urge of wanting a big warm bear hug from my friends but feel like I can't because of fear. I know my friends won't hurt me but touch is so foreign. It's like the adult in me wants to but the little kid inside kicks and screams no way. I guess all I can do is take it one day at a time . I wish there was an off button for all the pain but I can't go back to this or I'll never get out of this hell I live through daily. I look at my dog and wish I could be that happy without a care in the world. That's something I don't understand. I'm okay cuddling and hugging my dog but I can't even think of doing the same with another human. I guess I trust my dog more. I have to go. Another wave of pain is washing over me. Thank You!
 

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