Date:   9/13/2008 2:45:46 PM ( 16 y ago)
Hits:   2,934
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1256838

OK---I don't mean to be condescending in anyway at all. However, trust me when I say if you and she don't end up getting married, you will get past this. That doesn't mean that you might not stop wondering about the one that got away--that's normal. In time though, if you don't get back together, you may find that the one that got away wasn't the right one for you. Believe me, to this day I sometimes think about guys I dated in my college days, especially the ones I had strong feelings for, and yes, I do wonder where they are now. Yet I also am glad that I didn't end up married to any of them for various reasons. For years I thought about the guy in high school who used to carry my books for me but was too shy to ask me out (different times back then). Through the years I wondered about him. Ten years ago I saw him at our high school reunion and wondered if he even remembered me--he did. I met his wife (he told me about their grown sons) and introduced him to my husband and daughter. We still keep in touch by email and its good to hear from him. I have no regrets and neither does he. I point out all these things to show you that we do move on. Who knows? Maybe she and you won't get together until years later when your both widowed--it happens. In the meantime, please move on with your life. You're still young and there is much for you to experience yet. If she just wants to be friends and nothing more, you need to decide if you can live with that. Some people find it's too painful to do so. If that's the case with you, it's best to just cut things off.

For another perspective---I have a friend who got accepted at an Ivy League school. She turned them down to follow her boyfriend to a lesser known school. Things didn't work out and to this day, she regrets not going to the Ivy League school.

Trust me when I say this---if you and she break up for good, you will survive. It's hard to believe that now because you're still hurting but take your time and grieve. Also consider---she right now isn't treating you very nicely, is she?
 

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