Re: Need good sound advise please. by gilda ..... Relationship Support Forum
Date: 6/2/2008 5:44:05 PM ( 16 y ago)
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URL: https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1186262
There is another caution I feel compelled to mention to you....many women in your situation of being unmarried with a child has worked against them legally. I personally have no moral position on this, but the law does have significant advantages for wives, as opposed to gf's, who generally have zero rights and benefits.
I mention this because I have seen quite a few women who spent 10 years or more living with a guy, bearing his children and suddenly found themselves destitute, having little education because they had to raise the child and work 2 maybe-going-nowhere jobs while fulfilling their "domestic duties" ...I'm still wondering what HIS domestic duties are?
Suddenly they find they can't track down the ex for child support and can't support themselves AND pay for child care while working at X number of low-paying jobs. Meanwhile he still makes the most money (Women STILL earn 70 cents on the dollar compared to men). He won't be liable for spousal support no matter how dire your position. And community property to split will be nil, as there is no "community" without a marriage. Any assets (such as a house, pension/savings plans) you BOTH work for may end up in his name only as he probably makes the most $, and he will KEEP them.
So imagine hanging on in misery for 10, 15, 20 years and finally deciding you can't take anymore...and getting nothing to help you out. If you choose to spend the time thinking about it but not doing anything...marriage offers some financial protection.
Sure, you're young now and maybe can't picture life in 10 years...but now you have much to protect; your child and the one who will be most responsible for him...YOU.
Just something to think about. Many have screwed themselves by putting up with crap for too long, then finding their lives wasted and poor. Have you a supportive family you can depend on?
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