Date:   4/11/2008 12:29:03 AM ( 16 y ago)
Hits:   4,948
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1151798

Let me post this again since I do not see it on first glance

Often men and women who see a dream dissolving hang on

It is not that he (in this case) doe snot know that it is over with. He knows it is over with. He is mourning the loss of the dram or his conception of this woman as the one. He gave her another chance not because of anything particular about her but because he had a dream and he wanted it to be her.

Often we know intellectually that it is over. but our feelings have not caught up with our knowledge. In fact for me this is when the most pain is felt. It is the difference between what I felt before the intellectual knowledge of what has to break trusts, and the pain of hanging on to the tender feeling when it is clear the "other" is a heaping pile of stinky feces ( I don't think the original post had that description)or has no ethics, or had no self respect and therefore finds it difficult to respect others (much better)or whatever the conversation is

He knew it was over but his feeling had not caught up with the intellect, it is a process. It takes time. The process is human. It may take time to heal. For the intellect to catch up to the feelings.

While one is in this process they are vulnerable and would probably not care for advice that belittles their condition, however silly or stupid it may seem. What they are really searching for is understanding not advice.

The pain is being dumped onto the pages of CZ for at one ment.

It's really isn't about advice at all, but healing and understanding



 

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