Date:   2/19/2008 11:41:36 PM ( 16 y ago)
Hits:   4,785
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1115426

Hi,
I'm also 22 and was sexually abused by my dad. I totally understand what you're going through too because I've had an eating disorder since I was 14. I'm doing a gazillion times better now, but I still think about my body too much, criticize it and feel like there's something deeper there. I can identify with a lot of things you say, and I want you to know I'm totally with you on the feelings you have- especially that the emotional abuse is worse than anything because it is intangible and hard to even put in words. And for me, I start to doubt myself sometimes, (and I even have physical memories).
I think you're wise, though, because you know what's going on. You can recognize what you're doing. Some things that help me are trying to connect and be in my body- yoga and exercise help a lot. Taking deep breaths ( i rarely connect with the "belly" part of my being and it needs life, oxygen). I've also done lots of visualization and affirmations. Moving out and seperating myself from negative circumstances was a huge step as well. I like to write in my journal or talk to a friend which always helps because its a non-judgmental listener.
I am on the same path as you, and I hope on both of our behalves that we overcome these behaviors because we deserve better. Sometimes I think, if I take this out on my body, I'm just giving my dad more power because he's the root of all this. Overcoming my struggles is the best retaliation!!
But its not about retaliation, its about being happy with ourselves and loving ourselves. Knowing we deserve happiness and letting that come into our life. Letting go of the past and moving towards a better place. I wish that for both of us! You'll be in my thoughts. :-)
 

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