Date:   12/23/2007 2:41:37 AM ( 17 y ago)
Hits:   2,416
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1068770

"1. I was just wondering if it is a good thing if you tell your loved one that you miss them? Missing in itself is not a positive thing to focus on - does saying this lead to negative feelings or positive ones? What you mean when saying this is that you really would love to see the other or see them again. It is an expression that you love that person so much that you miss their presence in your life.

I did say that to my husband on that voicemail, that I really missed him and of course it sounded a little emotional. Did this make him feel bad? Is this something one should avoid at all costs?"

....................
Listen to your feelings. Your emotions indicate whether it is helpful or unhelpful to say "I Miss You" to your husband. A few days ago, I was chatting on the phone to my best friend who lives in Malta and both of us said "I miss you!" to each other. But there was no negative feelings there, it was really the same as saying "I love you"

Your husbands feelings are not your reponsibilty. Yours are. Focus on what feels good to you and at the same time, irrelevant of his thinking, feelings and actions, focus on how you would like it to be for him (seeing him successful and happy)

This is going to take a while, you have been where you are for a long time, so be gentle with yourself. With continued effort, it won't take many months for you to reach a consistent abilty to focus only on what you want.

If you only do what you do in order for his happiness or a successful outcome, that is not your point of power. Your power is in the now, and the power comes only from feeling good. So, the focus is always on what you want and allowing good feeling thoughts to guide you.

I'll cover point 2 in an hour or so, but have to do some stuff right now.
 

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