Date:   12/1/2007 12:08:49 PM ( 17 y ago)
Hits:   9,586
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1053385

Just wanted to say "Thank you" for taking the time to write your thought provoking post.

The fall down the stairs was when I was two and a half yrs. and I only know of it
from a small diary my mom kept. The fainting spells too were recorded. The visit to the dr.
was not, but I recall taking "Stewarts Formula".
Our family was not deeply religious, but my mom was a bit strict. My dad would back up
whatever she said, but he left the discipline decisions to her. She didn't become Catholic
till her mom passed away and I went to public school till 3rd grade. When my grandpa
died he left whatever he had to me, to be used for my benefit, so I got "better"
schooling. Being the youngest I was used to having people do for me.
I had little self discipline and was a lazy student. I recall day dreaming of having a pet brontisauris
who would poke it's head into the classroom window. Everyone would be terrified and run away
while I climbed onto his back and rode away. The nuns tended to use fear and ridicule to keep us
in line. So at that point in my life I didn't try and "be good" by studying, doing homework etc.
Just got by. Gradually I isolated myself from others to avoid painful situations.

While in my twenties I was interested in occult type subjects and read a book by
Isreal Regartti (sp?) he was involved in some secret socity like The Golden Dawn.
The book was called The Middle Pillar and the first half of it spoke about how
a person had to be psychologically sound before attempting to practice magic.
That the presence of some subconcious conflict will have the effect of short-circuting
the energy and causing mental breakdown. He said this was even more dangerous
with some eastern methods when unwisely practiced and could create a complete mental collaspse.
I don't know if he was speaking of kundalini, but that was what I thought of when I read it.
This explaination also helped me to better understand what I had experienced.

Your comment about breaking through this deep hypnosis struck a chord in me.
I woke up one day and wrote down, "It's all a lie. My whole life has been lived around this lie." I could see through this web of "victumhood" that I subject myself to, but fall prey to it.
Find myself still under the spell.
Anyway wanted to throw in that cautionary comment about kundalini,
even though I know nothing about the subject,- that's never stopped me before! :)


 

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