Date:   9/30/2007 10:19:40 PM ( 17 y ago)
Hits:   8,960
URL:   https://www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1011220

I'm with you Soul Survivor, I don't think it's so easy to categorize these, for lack of a better word, people. Robots would be a better word.

I was married to one for 7 years. I call that time of my life "The Twighlight Zone". This guy was dominant in both somatic and cerebral, and still is. He is a neurosurgeon and I shudder to think of patients going under his knife. He'd just as soon kill them as help them. And in fact, I'm certain he's done both.

I somehow had the wherewithal to leave and divorce him 20 years ago, but believe me, he did a lot of damage in those few years. We had two children and I left him when they were young because I knew he would destroy them if I didn't. I walked away from millions and millions of dollars and an "elevated" position in our community.

I've never regretted it. Both my children have thanked me for doing so many times. One will have nothing at all to do with him. The other has some communication with him but as little as possible and expects nothing from him.

The only thing I would have changed was to leave him even sooner. Our wedding day would have been a good day, but then I would have missed having two great kids.

I know it's been a long time for me since I went through this and maybe I don't belong on this forum, but having become addicted to curezone, I happened upon this NPD forum and can't help but put in 2 cents worth.

20 years later I still like having the affirmation that I did the right thing to leave, that I wasn't the crazy one, he is, and that the healing goes on still.

I'm also grateful that this forum is here for those who are now going through it. My advice to anyone doing so is going to be "Get Out Now". Everyday with one of these robots is another day of damage being done to yourself and your children if you have any. It's another day of damage that you are going to have to find a way to heal from.

Even though it's been so long, I still have a great deal of trouble with relationships with men. I just have a real hard time trusting them and have given up forever any thought of wanting to be with one. I like them for friends, but that's as far as I can go. Having been married to Dr. Jekell and Mr. Hyde, I expect them to turn into monsters. 7 short years did that for me so the sooner one gets out, the better chance one has of being in a normal relationship. I no longer care because I am 57 now, independent, and quite happy by myself. Still am alright to look at and still get hit on a lot, but I'm just not interested anymore, too old I guess.

I appreciate this forum even now though because I have a family member going through this. I have offered him (he is, I guess, my ex-step-father) a home with me. He's in his late 90's and asked his daughter to come live with him to help him out. He still works as a musician a couple of times a week and is still mentally very sharp, but she is destroying him. She wants his house. She's totally NPD and as mean and nasty as they get. I feel so sorry for him. I've called mental health, senior abuse, and his personal attorney many times. He's so scared of her he just stays, hoping it will get better. She doesn't want me around at all, of course, but I still cause her as much trouble as I can because I'm certain she wants to kill him off and it's much more difficult for her if I keep having people coming around to check up on the situation. It's his home and she wants him to leave! The only way he can get rid of her is to have her legally evicted and he doesn't want to do that. He still has hope. She tells him she hates him all the time, but he still hangs in there. It's very sad.

He says the only hope he has in his heart is that he knows that he can come and stay with me. I live very far from him and he's not yet ready, he says, to leave everything behind. He told me that when he is no longer able to play his music, he will come here.

Well, whew, I vented more than I intended to, but I feel better. It is always nice to find people who know what you are going through and can relate to it. Thanks for being there all you survivors. And for those of you going through this, know that you will eventually go from victim to survivor for you are stronger than the NPD robots, you are human, and that's a BIG advantage.

Mamahuhu


 

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