is your (ex)boyfriend circumcised? if so this may explain why he had to go fast and hard in order to enjoy sexual intercourse with you. because of the lack of foreskin the only erogeonous nerve endings on his penis will be in the glans (head) which means that unless it rubs against the inside of your vagina he will not experience any pleasure.
wheras a man with a foreskin has erogeonous nerve endings in the foreskin itself which rubs against the inside of the vagina so these men can go slower and softer and still feel intense sexual pleasure.
but if he is not circumcised then i guess he is just a crap lover lol