I think one of the things that hurt me the most is to have high expectations.
I do not know if your vibrance is going ot come back, but I feel that with your high expectations, if it comes back maybe you are not going to notice anyway.
I think to cure Depression we need to be more humble and learn how to accept little things from life.
What I can guarantee with Bowel Cleanse you will feel a sense of accomplishment for this little step. Be thankful for that.
Also everyday I am capable of going out for a walk and keep my discipline, is a triumph by itself, after many years of not being able to go out for a walk.
I count how many times I have been capable of get up after a fall, no how many times I have fallen, or if I am ever goign to be able to feel 100% fine. Life has a new meaning, and believe me it is also beautiful.
You need to see the little steps. No one can hike the Everest if is focusing in the great goal, the only way is to focus on every step, the preparations, the effort, the walk.
Dear Dawn, you are not alone, just try to relax and focus on one thing at the time, you will be better just for being able to accomplish a little goal everyday.