I wish that it were that simple!

Let me explain why I say that. I was raised in a family where my father was an alcoholic and abused my mother and all us children. So when I met and then married this woman I did not realize that the hitting, and the criticizing, and the blaming, and the degrading, and the put-downs, and my low self-esteem, and my not respecting myself were all-wrong! I did not know that it was wrong the way she treated me since my father treated me that same way it seemed that it was the way that people who loved me should treat me. I was all-wrong! It has taken me 25 years to learn that important lesson. Now I need to teach my children that lesson before they also end up in the same dilemma.

Pistol Pete I care a damn lot! And that is why I was confused in the first place! I have always tried to do what I was taught some of which is obviously wrong! The first time my wife struck me was when we were on our first date, I thought that she cared! I was wrong! You questioned whether I would forsake my wife how many more years do I need to be punched and kicked and bitten and yelled at and degraded? I know that I need to end this marriage and them find healing for all the hurt. I hope that some day I will be able to find love the way that God intended Love to be. Then maybe I will know who I am. Because right now I do not know who I am, I don’t know what I like, what I consider to be fun. All I know is that I have a couple of children who really need me to to what is right for them and myself!
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