Did God not accept my gift or did I not give the gift to God because I ate. Guess I wasn't sincere enough. I remember when I was able to go in to the fasting state for ten days, four days and people forced me to quit. Now I am away from other people and yet cannot start. Wish I could blame them but I have to take all the responsibility or I'll be a loser. Well, these people made me fat and live shorter life span. You don't know how hard it is to start fasting yet some other forces had to come and interfere. I don't like my body image right now. That's why it's so important to protect yourself. I was too naïve to protect myself. I was too honest. I don't know what the future holds for me in terms of fasting. I just know that I suck at it. If God knows everything about me, I only wish he could make it easier. I have to advance humanity here, so this obstacle has to be surpassed or I won't help the humankind. God should interfere and help because of my grand goal.