I guess I just want to proselytize! For anyone who is having doubts about whether to continue breast feeding, or if you are pregnant and trying to decide, listen to my story...

When I found out I was pregnant, I read everything I could get my hands on about pregnancy and infant care. My mother didn't breastfeed and my sister only did for about six weeks with her first child, so I didn't really have any experience with it whatsoever. The more I read, the more I became convinced that breastfeeding is what I wanted to do, and I would do it no matter what. And, boy was it tough!

The first challenge came right away - it turns out that I have flat nipples, which I didn't know could be a problem until about a day before I had my son. I tried wearing the shells to draw them out, but it didn't work for me. So, I wear the Medela Nipple Shield every time; one problem solved. Then everyone said that my milk would come in about the fourth or fifth day. Try six! I was really depressed, thinking that it wasn't going to come in at all. They had to supplement him in the hospital with formula, and I cried and cried. But finally, my milk did come in and all was well. I tried pumping some milk about the second week so my husband could feed him. That went okay, but the baby wouldn't eat from the bottles we gave him. I had registered for everything Avent, and their nipples on the bottles are most like the breast. All fine and good, unless you have flat nipples and have to wear the shield. So, I went and eventually found the Gerber bottles, which have a nipple similar to the nipple shield - and thankfully my son eats from those with no fuss.

After almost nine weeks, I have gone back to work, unable to pump there, and so I go about 12 hours between feeding in the evening. I have been feeding my son at about 3pm, and by the time I get home he is asleep, and sleeps until 2:30 or 3:30am. I am afraid my milk will fail, so we have decided to buy or rent an electric pump, so I can pump when I get home and at other times during the day so we don't have to supplement him with formula. My little manual pump just isn't up to the job of keeping him supplied. Yes it is expensive, but the cost is offset by the facts that I know my son is getting the best he can get, and knowing that if we would have to start giving him formula all the time, it would cost two or three times as much as renting a pump.

I am not putting down formula feeding at all. Although breast fed babies are healthier and smarter on average, that does NOT mean a formula fed baby will not be healthy or smart. But breastfeeding isn't just for the baby. I get so much from it, too! I have suffered from Depression in the past, and so we were on the lookout for me to have any symptoms of severe PPD, which did not occur at all. I can honestly say the only time I ever felt depressed was in the hospital, but that was because I was there for five days, and I hate, hate, hate hospitals. I also feel good knowing that even though it is sometimes frustrating and our society makes it inconvenient, breastfeeding really is the best thing I can do for my son. How terrific God made us, to be able to make food for our children! (I read one article where the author said she wouldn't breastfeed, as it was 'unnatural.' I'd like to know how she thinks the human race has survived for thousands of years!) I also feel a sense of accomplishment. I've always been a quitter when things get too tough, but we all change for our children, and only for the better.

In closing, the decision to breastfeed is absolutely a personal choice; one that should not be forced upon you, nor is it a choice to be made lightly. I just wanted to share a little with everyone and offer my support. I also hope this helps someone make the right decision for their baby!


"The world is full of women blindsided by the unceasing demands of motherhood, still flabbergasted by how a job can be terrific and torturous."
Anna Quindlen