passin' by, and glad of it 
Autumn
18 y
1,524
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Hullo,
Hoping it is ok to stop by. I have never had a drink but have attended many years of Al-Anon and also open AA meetings.
For a few years I lived in Kansas. Over the tracks outside town there was a little A.A. clubhouse. It was loud and chaotic and had a tin roof and ratty carpet and a lot of pickup trucks outside. It was packed with people, coffee, arguments, prayer, Big Books, ash trays, and blue smoke. It was open for continual meetings nearly 24/7. And you know, it was a place of miracles where people were saved by other people every single day. There were genuine rough-talking kind people who were not afraid to reach out to any stranger in any condition, or to say what needed saying if it was going to help reach someone in trouble.
One speaker there described walking into his first meeting. He pulled out a gun and said "A judge sent me here. I hate your guts. I want to shoot you all dead right now." The others said "Ya ya ya. Keep comin' back, Sicko. And if you expect us to give you any coffee, then sling that piece behind the door with everybody else's."
Last week I found a book in the trash called "Came to Believe." It's a fine book, now I carry it everywhere. It makes me miss those old meetings years ago. I have a big problem with depression, so I just checked the Big Book out of the library. It's good to read the program again and work on being sober from my own dejected thinking.
Anyway, it is nice to see this forum and the support and wisdom!
Much respect,
Autumn
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- Re: passin' by, and glad of it shadowalker164
18 y
1,405
MoreThis is a reply to # 269,279Advertisement
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What a great story about the guy with the gun. It is things like that that cut through the fog and give weight to this simple program.
One drunk leveling with another. There is a very powerful magic in that kind of thing.
I never saw a gun pulled in a meeting, but I have seen that kind if honesty and ego deflation at work many times. Autumn, you know that that stuff you remember so well still takes place in meetings all around the world as we speak. You are always welcome to grab a cup of coffee, pull up a chair and partake of what is so freely given.
“It's good to read the program again and work on being sober from my own dejected thinking.” Remember, alcohol is just a symptom of our bigger underlying problem. Like you, it is our stinkin’ thinkin’ that needs work.
And a meeting is as good a place to work on it as any. And a much better place than isolation.
Richard
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- Re: passin' by, and glad of it Autumn
18 y
1,486
Lugol’s Iodine Free S&H
J.Crow’s® Lugol’s Iodine Solution. Restore lost reserves.
Original Dr. Hulda Clark
Hulda Clark Cleanses
9 Day Fasting Program
Complete with herbs and clay to eliminate hunger and cleansing r...
This is a reply to # 269,281Hi Richard,
Thank you for this wisdom! The honesty and fellowship in the program really are remarkable. And they even reinforce each other. Once I can glimpse my true nature with clarity, it's natural to reach out person to person, instead of trying to look good enough to other people or hide from them. Then in fellowship with supportive people in recovery, it's easier to see myself in a clear calm way. (Years ago, members of an AA/Al-Anon meeting lovingly intervened when I announced to them that I was determined to take Step 4, my "searching and frantic moral inventory.")
For me, the heart of that defective thinking is "Oh, I don't measure up, so what is the use in trying." Sure, there were valid reasons for grieving, but now it's time to take stock. Sure, I was in a bleak space, and the world didn't necessarily show up with fruit baskets; but even those loved ones and friends who look happy and fortunate and successful have been frightened and hurt by my problems. Over the years they worried about me and had no idea how to help; and I sure didn't attend their birthday parties or their children's graduations or their Christmas dinners, let alone see that they had fears and doubts and problems too.
For months I've been depressed and even bitter about a family member who was very close to me, but she's been too successful and busy to talk or get together. Finally I made amends by picking up a phone and just asking how she is. We had a great talk and worked out our stuff.
For months I've been too depressed to get out of bed on time, and can spend hours cocooned up fretting about my life. The last few days, after asking for plenty of help the night before (and it takes a lot of Higher Power to manage this) when the alarm rings I jump out of bed and go jogging. It's incredible what a gift this is, and what a difference this makes.
It is essential to remind myself "There is always some small task worth doing right now, and some person who is worth reaching out to."
I don't want to interrupt your forum, but will be reading the notes from day to day while re-reading the Big Book. Right now they are a real treasure.
Blessings and appreciation,
A
- Re: passin' by, and glad of it Autumn
18 y
1,486
- Re: passin' by, and glad of it shadowalker164
18 y
1,405
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