In view of recent events that superficially appear to give false prophets reason to jump up and down excitedly while pointing to a verse in Revelation, I thought it was time to give this little piece another airing.

 

WHO HAS TIME TO WORK?

Folks, show a little forbearance - please! I'll have you know that being a false prophet is seriously hard work.

Just think of all the effort that goes into watching out for all those 'signs of the times'; pinning down that verse in the Apocalypse that has just been 'fulfilled before your very eyes' after scanning the latest newspapers and watching hours of newscasts from all the major networks; piecing together all those numerological, astrological, Kabbalistic and Gematriacal clues and tying them up with some random numbers in the Bible to reveal ............. errr ........... almost any date you care to fixate on; watching all those YT vids made by other false prophets to see if they agree with your own delusions (they rarely do) and branding them as the emissaries of Satan and false prophets if they don't, while the supreme irony of what you have just authored shoots straight over the top of your head; posting your latest findings on various social media; recounting and interpreting your latest 'rapture' dream for all those saps who hang onto your every word as if it fell to earth straight from the Throne of God; making false promises that this will definitely be your last vid. coz the secret rapture is about to whisk you into the upper stratosphere, only to follow up your 'promise' with ten more vids on the following day; responding to all the frenzied excitement you have just generated in others who feel compelled to throw in their two penny worth; writing books proclaiming the end of the world in the same year of their publication, only to have them completely trashed within a few short months by the trivial progress of Anno Domini; closely following the career path of the person you have wrongly identified as the antichrist yet again; ......... and finally, of course, not forgetting the stupendous amount of energy expended on ignoring all those warnings in the Bible that expressly condemn all such activity!!

I mean, the list is almost endless. Who has time for work? No, your friendly local false prophet needs your support. They serve an important psycho-social function in testing the level of your credulity, so please give generously. And always remember, a false prophet is not just for Christmas."